Just Runnin On


Arson for Dummies:
PatientOnionSF: my kitchen is not filled with smoke yet,
i must be doing something wrong

The Lion Sleeps Tonight:
Hyperion x3: time to listen to sound of jungle and slowly fall
asleep in the jungle in my mind


Hallucination:
Prospect26: Evening, Jam. Whow...you are the picture!

Declining the Honor:
Prospect26: Jam...so you are the main man here in bookshelf.
Jam7604801: no pros

Little Miss Sunshine:
Prospect26: I guess I don't even care about children roaming the
yard. I have no marriages, no grandchildren. Zero. Zip. Nada.


Born to Be Wild:
AmberDevilRay8: I'm the only person in my neighborhood who lets
their kids wander more than 5 feet beyond the porch.
AmberDevilRay8: Without knee pads and helmets.

I Am Curious Hello:
Prospect26: tom..is this your picture?
Tom Brite: yes prospect
Prospect26: are you happy with this picture?
Tom Brite: yes why
Prospect26: just curious


No, he really keeps pigs:
PatientOnionSF: my landlady told me to clean up my pig sty again
Tom Brite: most older homos keep a clean home

Been there, done that:
AmberDevilRay8: I'm sure I've mentioned my three-legged pig before.
AmberDevilRay8: Elroy
Tom Brite: why are all pet pigs named elroy?
AmberDevilRay8: Not really. =(
AmberDevilRay8: I was just trying to set up a lame joke I've told
in here already.

With Glue?:
Prospect26: I have mant tenants who adhere to their lease,


Joys of Motherhood:
BeaTleBby: oh cause I love reading..I even read in teh shower
HAHA...it's so relaxing
BeaTleBby: this is the most amusing conversation i've had all day
....then again...my 11 month old doesn't talk so...
AmberDevilRay8: Soon you'll regret teaching your kids to speak.
AmberDevilRay8: The sooner they learn to talk the sooner they
learn to talk back.


The Aristocrats:
AmberDevilRay8: Both of my children had uncommon first words.


I do not like that I-sam-appaled!:
Prospect26: I am watching this conversation from New Hampshire
and I sam appaled.

Lincoln Logs?:
Prospect26: I have 30 plus tenants. So I am a good and
log-lived landlord


Book Review:
DoomGrl: The Irresistable Henry House
DoomGrl: henry house is about a practice baby
BinxB91: a practice baby?
DoomGrl: yes, in college home economics classes they would get
babaies from orphanages to practice on
AmberDevilRay8: Man, at my school they just gave us an egg.
DoomGrl: and this novel imagines what would happen to a baby that
had 6 or 7 mommies a year
DoomGrl: they lived in a house with it and the teacher
PatientOnionSF: According to the latest study, a baby can recognize
up to five mothers, but after five the baby goes schizophrenic


Tom's Friends:
Tom Brite: i know several men who first had sex at age 27
BinxB91: with each other?
quiet scientist: or with you?
Tom Brite: no with women
Tom Brite: i am not jewish but was older at my first experience
BinxB91: what took them so long?
Tom Brite: idk
BinxB91: I was 24
PatientOnionSF: i was stoned
BinxB91: I wasn't
PatientOnionSF: and she paid for the motel, and she gave me
crustaceans




Doom's Men:
DoomGrl: I am mean because I do not let them love me, and I am
unfaithful
DoomGrl: to everyone
BinxB91: Doom?
DoomGrl: what
BinxB91: are you quoting?
DoomGrl: no, it was in answer to a question from another nite

Go and Multiply:
PatientOnionSF: doom, i told bob sur mom never to come in this
chatroom again
DoomGrl: why, Onion?
PatientOnionSF: cuz he is dyslexic
PatientOnionSF: a trait common amongst slavs


[Friday night was date night, named for the date Sarah and
Tom would go on while Lyon slept over at my house. But
because they usually stayed home and fought, and Lyon and
I more often went out to dinner and saw a movie, date
night became our code for Night of Endless Fun. Don't
underestimate how much joy an eight-year-old and and
almost-forty-year-old can bring each other. We usually
began at Miso Happy, our favorite Japanese place. We
thought the name was terrible, but we liked the noodles.
We talked about everything, including but not limited to:
My gray hairs, should I dye them? Could I dye them
individully? Could I pay a mouse with a tiny paintbrush
to jump on my head and dye them one by one? And why did
Tom and Sarah have to fight so much? Was it Lyon's fault?
No, absolutely not. Could she stop them from fighting?
Again, no. Also: would they buy her a twenty-four-color
pen set, and, if they did, how jealous would best friend
Claire be when Lyon brought it to school? Our guess was
very. And why had Deb's last boyfriend dumped her?
I dumped him.
Maybe you didn't French-kiss him enough.
I promise you that wasn't it.
Tell me how many times a day you kissed, and I'll say if
it was enough.
Four hundred.
Not enough.]


Doom's Closet:
DoomGrl: my finances are in disarray


Her Morality/His Lexicography:
DoomGrl: the word virgin doesnt really mean anything
PatientOnionSF: DoomGrl, then why bother having the word?



THE BEATLES!!:
DoomGrl: Bea, do you like the Beatles? whose your favorite Beatle?
BinxB91: I read the news today oh boy
DoomGrl: omg, dont mention that song
BinxB91: It's just another day
BinxB91: She came in through the bathroom window
DoomGrl: when he sang, he blew his mind out in the car,
I freaked out
BinxB91: ...
DoomGrl: I was like paralyzed and everybody behind me started honking
DoomGrl: it was horrible
BinxB91: gee Doom
BinxB91: I always imagine you as fairly serene
BinxB91: unflappable
DoomGrl: me? you must be kidding
BinxB91: I guess you can be flapped
BinxB91: kidding? no. I just misjudge you
DoomGrl: and then this nice police lady got in the car and
moved it over
BeaTleBby: I love them
DoomGrl: Who do you love?


And Dreamed of Clocks and Cheese:
Niontron9: i feel asleep watching "swiss family robinson"

Remake Reminder:
quiet scientist: they're remaking yellow submarine
BeaTleBby: ugh really?
DoomGrl: as another cartoon?
BinxB91: He's a real Nowhere man
quiet scientist: i saw that on that "hollywood is running out
of ideas" link i posted earlier
DoomGrl: in Henry House, Henry goes to London and is one of the
animators for the Yellow Submarine.



One Simple Adage:
Niontron9: when you approach a girl, that girl thinks the boy
is going to think she is as great when the boy get to know the
"real" her, so she plays around...so her insecurity does not
allow her to get love

VENT:
GiRL TaLK 874: This chick I work with is pregnant; I need to vent.
GiRL TaLK 874: She's getting BIGGGGG and telling people to eat
crap at work


Meet GiRL TaLK:
GiRL TaLK 874: This chick is pregnant
GiRL TaLK 874: She's pushing crap food on the office
PatientOnionSF: 874 is girl's IQ
KissMyAsterix: you sure that's not her sat score
PatientOnionSF: she can make a nuclear bomb with paper clips and
a box of cookies
GiRL TaLK 874: Kiss are you a male?
PatientOnionSF: we are all gay men
Catpower777: not that there's anything wrong with that...
PatientOnionSF: which is your favorite hot pepper?
GiRL TaLK 874: Chinese mustard
GiRL TaLK 874: Jalapenos i suppose
PatientOnionSF: girl you must live in pennsylvania
BinxB91: She was born in August, 1974
GiRL TaLK 874: ya
GiRL TaLK 874: August 74
PatientOnionSF: wow, you're the oldest one in the chatroom
PatientOnionSF: 36
GiRL TaLK 874: I'm 35
PatientOnionSF: how many times have you reproduced?
GiRL TaLK 874: 2
PatientOnionSF: yikes

Undercover of Course:
GiRL TaLK 874: There are security guards online

KEEPER:
GiRL TaLK 874: I went to author's lounge
GiRL TaLK 874: That's why i'm here

The Zodiac Killer:
xnorthstarx1: the only girl ive ever loved, and ive had
physical relationships /w at least a dozen women, was an
aquarian.
xnorthstarx1: i wonder why it was her


Kingsley and Curley:
GiRL TaLK 874: That book sucked
Pablo Bigasso: Girl, I take it you're female....
Pablo Bigasso: Amis doesn't go down too well with women, generally.
Cognomen98: like the Three Stooges


America Runs on Dunkin:
GiRL TaLK 874: Stop eating donuts
BinxB91: I won't stop eating dounuts. But I might consider
throwing the 2nd half of the dounut out the car window on my
way to work
GiRL TaLK 874: That's a start
PatientOnionSF: binky you got a job!
GiRL TaLK 874: He has a fat boss
PatientOnionSF: throw out the third half, you need your strength
for scanning and bagging books
BinxB91: Onion, I HAVE 2 JOBS!
PatientOnionSF: binky's TWO jobs: (1) scanning the book, and
(2) putting the book in a bag


Occaisonal Attacks Only Please:
color opticsIdea: I need people to stop persistantly attacking me.


Doom Visits a Book Store:
DoomGrl: Hi Binx Bolling. I was in the Tattered Cover and I
almost bought the MovieGoer but I put it back. it cost too much
money. TJs picture is over the Metaphysics section now

Favorite Title:
DoomGrl: did you ever read that annie proulx story
"Tits Up in a Ditch"?

Stay Tuned:
DoomGrl: something gross happened to my friend Eden

Stay Tuned:
BobsurAuntTom: Y'know what's great about jazz?

That Crazy Dixie Strikes Again:
DoomGrl: Dixie had a chocolate fondue party
DoomGrl: Whiskey almost flew into the pot
DoomGrl: Whiskey is her Sugar Glider

Hey, who doesn't?!:
stevedrumsdw: So who in here likes ponies?


The Summer of Her German Shepard:
DoomGrl: I read Gravity Rainbow one summer when I slept on
the floor and decided not to use electric lights
DoomGrl: I read by a coleman lantern and slept with my german
shepherd Wolfgang Amadeus


Amber Opportunity:
AmberDevilRay8: A bee stung me, and the black sheep wrecked
another brother's car.
AmberDevilRay8: Who has pestered me all day to co-sign for a
loan for a new one.
ThralledByTree: is the sting alright?
ThralledByTree: use lotion huh
quiet scientist: i've never been stung by a bee
quiet scientist: or any insect
AmberDevilRay8: It's not as bad as others might make it out.
AmberDevilRay8: I was only trying to fill the entrance to their
nest with liquid foam.
AmberDevilRay8: And one attacked me.
AmberDevilRay8: That meant war.
quiet scientist: did you kill them all?



The Wasteland:
ThralledByTree: busted butt to make this university get there
ThralledByTree: yet Kiss is the president
ThralledByTree: I nothing
ThralledByTree: I know only math.



Playing With Fire:
ThralledByTree: well Fort Adams is secure in Newport RI
ThralledByTree: advanced technologies installed
ThralledByTree: the fort is revolutionary war
ThralledByTree: we updated to star trek
BinxB91: Fort Adams? never heard of that
ThralledByTree: yes yes
ThralledByTree: I know the army guy that works there
ThralledByTree: we went and wandered inside
BinxB91: Maybe he's pulling your leg
ThralledByTree: there are secret tunnels
BinxB91: Sounds like a museum
ThralledByTree: no
ThralledByTree: He has uniforms.
ThralledByTree: and medals and ribbons and a mil ID
BinxB91: and a secret decoder ring?
ThralledByTree: the ID states
ThralledByTree: property of US government
ThralledByTree: are you out of your skull?
ThralledByTree: guy is US ARMY
BinxB91: out of my skull? no, I don't think so
ThralledByTree: My father was.
BinxB91: so it's genetic then
ThralledByTree: My great grandfather an admiral United States Navy.
ThralledByTree: My grnadfather OSS.
BinxB91: Grandfather Oss? Like the Wizard of OSS?
ThralledByTree: Binx you are playing with fire making comments
in refernce to these people.
BinxB91: Did he like to dress in women's clothing?



Newbie Vetting:
balletguy26: hello
Cognomen98: hi balletguy
balletguy26: how are you?
Tom Brite: are you a homosexual?