Draft Legislation

BookShelf Beauty Tips:
EDruezillaB: i want to look hot at 50
BinxB91: Edie, stay out of the sun and avoid sweets
Forkrerereredux: miss edie, let's go on a hot date
EDruezillaB: i'm in the sun a tiny bit and i generally avoid
food altogether
Forkrerereredux: that's good
Forkrerereredux: girls shouldn't eat much
Forkrerereredux: the less, the better
Alansueton: EDrue not good to mix food with so much booze


Had a Bad Day:
Forkrerereredux: what's the point of even signing on?

Paranoia Will Destroy Ya:
Hyperion x3: somebody is telling creepy, aka boulshevit
when I am here or not
Hyperion x3: who is the culprit

Are You Strong Enough to be My Man?:
EDruezillaB: you know, if a man wants me to wear panty hose
and heels, he best be prepared to do the same for me.


Edie and the Cruisers:
BinxB91: Edie, what do you do to look pretty?
EDruezillaB: binx, i look pretty with sweats on. i look pretty
with heels, or nothing but heels.
Forkrerereredux: guys like when girls get dressed up for them
EDruezillaB: fork, true
Forkrerereredux: but girls stop doing that a week into the relationship
Forkrerereredux: they all get lazy
Hyperion x3: fork, I like it when they don't dress at all
Forkrerereredux: show up in sweatpants or some shit
Alansueton: yeah men are known for being overworkers in relationships
EDruezillaB: alan hahahaha
Hyperion x3: alan, true they try too hard to "impress"
Alansueton: fork the only work you did was poor driving and swinging
purses
Forkrerereredux: would you believe fork showed up to pick up his ex one
day and she was wearing sweatpants with some mud on the bottom?

Edie and Cruisers Reject:
Hyperion x3: that is stupid, this gives the women the message that
they don't have to try to do anything to keep the relationship healthy


Diary of a Wimpy Kid:
Hyperion x3: talibans are the progessivest being on earth
Hyperion x3: no television, no women can go to shcool
Hyperion x3: that's the kind of world we want
Alansueton: Hyperion they deny women the right to education and
any form of equality even good Muslims state this
Alansueton: rono you shouldn't watch tv either and the internet
is just a supplement of TV it is viewing a screen
Alansueton: corrupts language
Hyperion x3: no, alan, they mean, women should be only homeschool
...otherwise they would make boys not pay attention to studies
Hyperion x3: as they are always horny
Hyperion x3: michael jackson was homeshooled
Hyperion x3: michael moore never went to college
Hyperion x3: which means education system don't create great people


"or a Muslim chat room?"
Hyperion x3: it has nothing to do with islam...going to war against
a country based on false accusation is wrong
Hyperion x3: not matter what they believe in
Alansueton: Rono I am against the war in Afghanistan myself it
doesn't mean I should support the Pakistani and ISI backed Taliban
Forkrerereredux: that war is still going on?
Hyperion x3: alan, have you ever been to a muslim country?
Hyperion x3: or a muslim chat room?



Round Up the Usual Prospects:
Prospect26: if you have a problem while here...let us know.

Prospect26: gosh...i do not want anyone to think that I am the room.

Prospect26: at some point in time, some one takes over the room.


About Last Night:
Skeleton coat: We did talk, I'm sure of it. How else would
I know you were blonde?
quiet scientist: i don't doubt it
quiet scientist: i just don't remember


Apropos of Nothing:

Beysshoes: i love creamed corn

quiet scientist: why does south park suck now?

quiet scientist: my nipples :-\

Alansueton: I am a gracious person



Unsexy Tongue Kissing:
Forkrerereredux: fork has dated girls with bulimia and could
taste their vomit in the back of his throat

All the Boys Go 'ahhhh':
BinxB91: the girl from Impanema
quiet scientist: i've never heard that song
quiet scientist: because there are no elevators in boise

Her Old School:
quiet scientist: it's like playboy but with girls with tattoos
and piercings
quiet scientist: and a lot of them are actually very pretty


A Crazy 8?:
FoodSIutSF: bey, binky said to say hello
Beysshoes: was he here onions?
FoodSIutSF: he is writing a book on blogs for Harper Row
FoodSIutSF: he quit his job scanning books and as a best buy stock boy
FoodSIutSF: it's his big break in life
Beysshoes: it'll be a best seller
FoodSIutSF: yes, he might even dedicate it to you if you give him
a **** **8



Onion Out-Humbled:
Beysshoes: bullock gave 2 million to haiti...how much did you donate?
FoodSIutSF: the b*tch should have given the money BEFORE the
earthquake you racist pig you
Beysshoes: racist? you're delusional you ass
FoodSIutSF: so they could have PREVENTED all the death and misery,
have you no intelligence?
Rafo65: ?
Beysshoes: well, i'm here on a Friday night yakking with you ...
if that answers your Q



Come On Guys, Lighten Up:
Tom Brite: soo depressed about Sunday
Beysshoes: why Sunday tommy?
Tom Brite: the end of our republic maybe bessy
Tom Brite: obamacare
FoodSIutSF: tom, you are the typical halfwit hillbilly who repeats
what ever your big fat drug addled f*g guy Rush says
FoodSIutSF: you ret*rded parrot you, tom
Alansueton: I mumble, without equivocation, fuck everyone
Beysshoes: okay we'll get in line for you para


BookShelf Poet Laurate:
Alansueton: muffled pain is like the distant call of a bird
of carrion

"where's my Knute Rockne?"
Alansueton: Beys, had 3 wisdom teeth and one tooth removed Thursday
Beysshoes: oh mah poor baaaby are you okay?
FoodSIutSF: alan, that's a lot of stitches and yogurt drinking,
i will call to doom to come over and comfort you
Beysshoes: or should i ask if your maid is okay para? (smile)
FoodSIutSF: [calling doom on pink kitty phone]
Alansueton: yeah Im "set adrift" PM Dawn style on pain meds and
sweets stuff taken in with a straw
Alansueton: where's my Knute Rockne, KMA?
Beysshoes: pain meds! you bastid so that's why you had them pulled.
Alansueton: Bey you can't have any

It's the Pain Talkin':
Alansueton: Beys pain meds and antibiotics anti-inflammatories too
no boners for me
FoodSIutSF: obviously not, load the shotgun alan
Tom Brite: its over well all be pinko pansies like onion
Alansueton: but the world is a warm place that hums
Alansueton: Foodslut is singing to the choir he's correct kick you
selfish anti-social bastards out go be alone on an island and
hoarde shit



Her Dull Life:
DoomGrl: i hardly ever sharpen pencils any more


Onion and a Newbie:
Crazymissmartha: i don't need rescuing
PatientOnionSF: martha, what do you need?
Crazymissmartha: an apple
PatientOnionSF: fuji
Crazymissmartha: please
PatientOnionSF: like eve in the garden of Even
Crazymissmartha: not quite
PatientOnionSF: Martha, are you a good cook?
Crazymissmartha: i don't know
PatientOnionSF: What are you good at?
Crazymissmartha: i don't cook much
PatientOnionSF: you don't cook much, you don't eat much
PatientOnionSF: you are in harmony
Crazymissmartha: i eat enough
Crazymissmartha: what am i good at?
Crazymissmartha: drawing
Crazymissmartha: what are you good at onion?
PatientOnionSF: cooking & romancing
PatientOnionSF: writing & baking
PatientOnionSF: kissing & chocolate
Crazymissmartha: so you say



Author's Lounge Does Not Suffer Fools:
EddieDont: poor slob goes in the authors lounge and makes a
complete fool of himself
EddieDont: they run him out

Delusion #2:
EddieDont: yeah binx seen u make of fool of yourself in there too


So Listen To Me, Will Ya!:
Niontron9: The people who read a lot can help themselves more than
other people
Niontron9: there are some value to most statements...so don't just
brush off people...

The Unbelievable:
BinxB91: Do you really live in Idaho?
quiet scientist: yes
quiet scientist: how come no one ever believes me when i say that?

Doom Trumped:
DoomGrl: i like how in dogs like golden retrievers their tongue
lolls out when they get hot and they look silly
Forkrerereredux: dogs are stupid

JINX kindof:
Forkrerereredux: she is a waitress trying to be an actress
FoodSIutSF: maybe fork's ex-gf is TJ's new muse?
DoomGrl: wouldnt it be funny if there was this actress who wanted
to be a waitress
BinxB91: Any actresses trying to be waitresses?
DoomGrl: jinx binx, kindof


Onion Not So Silly:
FoodSIutSF: Lily Tomlin said she went to Hollywood to become a
waitress, couldn't find a job waiting, and got a job as an actress.
FoodSIutSF: she's the ONLY one

Doom's Big Brother:
DoomGrl: I am kind of melancholy tonite
FoodSIutSF: tonight?????????
FoodSIutSF: EVERY NIGHT

Stuff Rono Knows:
DoomGrl: i got a card that says somebunny loves you
FoodSIutSF: is it one of those cards that talk when you open it up?
FoodSIutSF: how do they do that?
FoodSIutSF: I bet rono knows
FoodSIutSF: rono knows about stuff like that
Niontron9: Human mind always find excuses to not to take the initiatives



Greet the New Girl, Quick!
mrsboonah: hi
KissMyAsterix: hi
KissMyAsterix: here's your chance alan, greet her
BinxB91: mrs boonah, what do you read?
KissMyAsterix: another room, she left
Alansueton: KMA you scared her
Alansueton: accosting her
Various704: saying hi and all that. so bossy
KissMyAsterix: maybe she does that aim thing and was afraid
you'd 'greet' her after reading what you'd said
Alansueton: ha
Alansueton: girls like poo
KissMyAsterix: clearly the whole shit topic is a show stopper
Alansueton: KMA I wrote a new ditty on my blog it's very
"personal" yet wrapped in the trappings of a Universal
Various704: a universal what?
Various704: remote control?
Alansueton: Various something fundamental shared by all

[Halfway down the block, Ruben said, Before you were born,
Deborah and I took walks in the dark. Mary Grace didn't
answer. The store was a little Italian market, brightly
lit, filled with people on their way home from work. Toby
Ruben and Mary Grace chose a round loaf with a thick crust
and some cheese, and waited together on the the long line
to pay, not speaking except when Mary Grace asked if she
could also have olives, and Ruben, delighted to be asked
for something, agreed. When they emerged, Mary Grace took
the bag from Ruben as if Ruben were old and bread were
heavy. Her arms freed, Ruben touched Mary Grace's arm,
and at that, still standing in the light in front of the
store, the girl thrust the groceries back at Ruben after
all, and put her cold hands on Ruben's head, as if she
were an apple she might pick. But she held Ruben's head
tightly, held her hair, then slowly moved her hands
greedily over Ruben's scalp and then her face, while
Ruben held the brown paper bag and felt something
resembling happiness begin in her throat. For a long time
Mary Grace touched the skin and bones of Ruben's face, and
touched her ears, while uncurious shoppers hurried out of
the store and down the street or to their cars. In the
background, car engines caught and cars drove away from
the corner. Soon the store would close. At last Mary
Grace leaned over and kissed Ruben on the mouth. Her face
was wet. Ruben kissed back, then put her free arm around
the girl and turned toward home, and they walked
together.
- You wouldn't mind if I cried everyday, Mary Grace said.
- Hell, no, I cry everyday, said Ruben. You'd better live
with us.
- Peter got tired of it. My Dad hates it.
- Doesn't he cry?
- Yes, but I think he thinks I'm faking after all this time.
My sisters can't believe how much I cry.
- You were the baby. You're too young to be on your own.
- I'm pretty grown-up. I'm older than Stevie.
- Stay with us, sweetie, Ruben pleaded. You must stay at
our house starting this minute.
- I have to take care of my father.
- No, you don't. And anyway, you aren't.
- It's true, I just sleep]



Possessed:
Various704: southern man, better keep your head, dont forget what
your good book said.
Various704: man, i just burst into song



Waiting For the Girls to Show Up:
Forkrerereredux: asia, are you named after the band asia,
or are you from asia, or asian?
Asia7384: Fork, I didn't know how to spell asiatic

Melo as the Explainer:
Forkrerereredux: temple university is a nigger school
BinxB91: jesus Fork
Forkrerereredux: a nigger school in a nigger neighborhood
Melodramamama22: bigger. he means bigger.


Why DoomGrl Sometimes Sleeps In the Closet:
DoomGrl: that guy I met and bath and body works called me last nite
DoomGrl: the one that wanted me to smell the candle for his girl friend

Girls Just Wanna Have _____:
Cognomen98: well, I never eat a whole chocolate bar
Cognomen98: I like to pace myself
Melodramamama22: you must not be a girl

Race to the Bottom:
Various704: hey zach. i resent you taking my place at the bottom
of the room list
Various704: piss off

Keeping 'em Wondering:
Forkrerereredux: last thing fork need is these assholes knowing
what he looks like


Vocabulary Night NOT:
Gleam1946: this room is like the final redoubt of the Nazis, the
room is recalcitrant and they don't even know what that means
DoomGrl: what does recalcitrent mean
BinxB91: I'm not looking up recalitrant
EDruezillaB: me either
EmpressZ21: me either
DoomGrl: me neither
Melodramamama22: don't look it up. it means something along
the lines of abashed/apologetic
Melodramamama22: regretful
Melodramamama22: something like that


AHA! ... Chocolate?:
Melodramamama22: i went out with the trader joes manager the other
night and his phone kept blowing up
Melodramamama22: and he wouldn't answer it
Melodramamama22: which makes me go
Melodramamama22: AHHA! wife/g/f
DoomGrl: i love trader joes dark chocolate almond bark
DoomGrl: could you get me a discount

Like Tar?:
DoomGrl: i like outsider art
DoomGrl: like the kind made out of feathers and stuff like that

So Do Good Dances:
Hyperion x3: I think that mentality comes from racism

Horror Movie Act I:
DoomGrl: i heard this big thump