STAY WARM - Regarding BookShelf as a "wasteland", I have
sometimes felt the same. I could barely stand it more
than an hour or two.
Still, on my drive home from work on late nights, I look
forward to visiting with "you guys". I'd much rather
have a warm body waiting my homecoming but in the
meantime, I enjoy the company here.
I know many of you have warm bodies in your bed but
since they may be comatose, BookShelf is your pleasant
alternative.
Today it hit me that some of you ARE the warm bodies.
That thought warmed me. Be good to each other.


Hopefully Just a Phase:
CordialCactus: my kids are insane right now

The Witching Hour:
Summers Eve L: Right. Because we are just tramps.
Anais3233: dude, shall we continue the gaping asshole talk?
NoraMcKee525: oh dear god
Anais3233: ok, wait, i have to put kids to bed.

Fork Setting Up:
Forkrerereredux: if you build it, they will come
Gollygee889977: what?
Forkrerereredux: it
Forkrerereredux: if you build it, they will come
BinxB91: So Golly, are you thick-skinned?
Forkrerereredux: binx, you missed a wonderful tranny discussion
earlier
Gollygee889977: Do you mean big
Forkrerereredux: no one means big

Binx Is So Fucking Funny:
Gollygee889977: im 19
Josh Maxwell4: 24
BinxB91: Golly, watch out for Josh. He's so horny even the crack
of dawn isn't safe

Fork in Touch With His Feelings:
Forkrerereredux: fork needs something less cute, more slutty

Tranny Generalized:
Kan wa ma kan: i would hate being married to a tranny
Brianna CD123: i think people generalize way to much
Brianna CD123: thats what makes them boring
Brianna CD123: saying things like "i would hate to be married
to a tranny" is quite a generalization
BinxB91: generalization: "i think people generalize way to much"
Brianna CD123: in fact the act of categorzing is a generalization
Alansueton: Brianna I think you generalize everyone who says
that as being boring
Forkrerereredux: Brianna CD123: yeah, i'm a tranny :-[
Alansueton: Trannies are ugly and scare children


Deep Thoughts by Jack Rono:
Onimesh: if you don't have love for mankind in your heart...you
can't be a good writer
Onimesh: I have almost never called anyone stupid

Fork Posessed:
Forkrerereredux: Hello, This is Marshmellow. (thats not a real name,
just a nick name) lol. anyway, if you didn't know that, then well..
you don't know me. lol.
Forkrerereredux: oh well. that was really random stuff wasn't it? LoL Forkrerereredux: My favorite hobbies?? jeez, thats going to take
awhile. I'm in a band, (I play the flute. Its the school band.) I'm
also in theatre, ummm french 2 , (j'aime franciase) (i think i wrote
that right... he he)
Forkrerereredux: anyway, i'm in love with books. seriously. my faves
are, Jane Eire, Witness, Inkheart, Artemis Fowl, Harry Potter,
Frankenstien, (i love mary shelly!!!)
Forkrerereredux: The Cay, The Supernatural, umm, The Five Ancesstors,
The StoryTellers Daughter, Charlie Bone, MY Friend Beks STORY!!!
(whoo!!!!) and exetra.
Forkrerereredux: I'm also in love with HEROES!!!! i love that
t.v. show. seriously.


Who Knew?:
Onimesh: that tired old man here is me...

Embrace the Slumminess:
Kan wa ma kan: plasma tv makes me think of a nebulous crystal
ball flattened like mr bill and we but gazing on the remains into
an altrenate reality
Gypsyjo47: Kan what are you doing in the Book shelf? Slumming?
Kan wa ma kan: jo, why is this slumming?
Kan wa ma kan: are you suggesting this is a lower class of chat
than al ?
Gypsyjo47: Kan most AL folks consider the book shelf slumming


Condor Deconstructs:
Mentros: Ibsen was one of Hitler's main inspirations,
especially The Master Builder
Condorblues: hitler never read ibsen
Condorblues: hitler was the sarah palin of his time


What Are You Wearing?:

Sleepy Eyed Evie: jeans and a sweatshirt

CordialCactus: light blue fleece jammie pants with grey snowflakes
and a grey sweatshirt


Leslie and the Night Visitors:
BinxB91: I just read about pilates be banned from safety islands
in Santa Monica
Zoshka5: I wish I could increase room font, I was excited about
pirates attacking Safety Island in Santa Monica
LeslieHapablap: zoshka, i live in santa monica and have not seen
any pirates. However, yesterday i saw three raccoons.


It's the Blue Font:
Zenchef2006: heya evie, you look familiar



Odds and Odds:

Tom Brite: i would like to see joe biden naked

Zoshka5: I'm not fond of those eskimo boots that are popular
among dim girls, stupidity is tolerable, sweaty feet is not

BoreUsYelledSin: I actually find the missionary position quite
satisfying most of the time.

AnnAsphodel: McCain's on Conan

Offpat: pleasant people are very annoying

Ooolijay: i am a sympathy puker



Hiding Your Webbed Feet?:
Sleepy Eyed Evie: whats the point of high heels in bed?

Sex Researcher:
CordialCactus: do people who have been married for years
french kiss/make out kiss/swap spit?

Jack Van Impe Fan:
Godwit935: Does anyone here watch that Dr. Jack Van Impe and his
wife, Rexella? They are on the Trinity Broadcasting Network.
ThePaIeRlDER: nope i dont watch that christian crap
ThePaIeRlDER: i am not a 'brother' in christ jesus
Anais3233: I love revelationists
Anais3233: they are SO funny
ThePaIeRlDER: my hypocracy does not extend to praising he whom i cuss
Anais3233: and i've been watching them for YEARS
Anais3233: not regularly
Anais3233: but irregularly
Anais3233: they have quite a following
Godwit935: Pale, why don't you like religion?
ThePaIeRlDER: because the message is the same regardless of the group
ThePaIeRlDER: our guy is the guy the others are false
Anais3233: yes, that message of be a good person is a toughie to follow
ThePaIeRlDER: then there is the 'we are humble part
ThePaIeRlDER: what part of we go to heaven and if you dont believe
as we do you go to hell is huumble?
Godwit935: I like Dr. Jack Van Impe and his wife, Rexella.
Anais3233: yes, they are like a comedy show. the amount of makeup
on the two of them couldn't fit in a five gallon bucket
Godwit935: I think they are sincere, Anais.
Anais3233: OOh yes, jack, the end is coming praise the lord


Though It's Mostly Platonic:
BoreUsYelledSin: I'm fucking Matt Damon

Annie the Erection Killer:
Tom Brite: i sometimes get an erection looking at myself in
the mirror
Annie77772: Tom....if you get an erectuion looking in the mirror
and your reflection does not....are you a vampire

Odd Flirting:
Ooolijay: doomgirl is feeling small
DoomGrl: wee

Literary Discussion:
DoomGrl: i was thinking of el perro del mar
Cognomen98: dog of the sea?
DoomGrl: woof

DoomGrl Has That Effect:
Ooolijay: i forgot i was doing laundry

[She kissed me.
'I can't make love to you,' she said.
Relief and despair.
'But I can kiss you.'
And so, from the first, we separated our pleasure. She lay on
the rug and I lay at right angles to her so that only our lips
might meet. Kissing in this way is the strangest of distractions.
The greedy body that clamours for satisfaction is forced to
content itself with a single sensation and, just as the blind hear
more acutely and the deaf can feel the grass grow, so the mouth
becomes the focus of love and all things pass through it and are
re-defined. It is a sweet and precise torture.]


Inspired:
Zoshka5: oh and the film Secretary with Maggie G. was based on a
Gaitskill story
Cognomen98: wow
Cognomen98: I did not know that
DoomGrl: i wonder how many girls were inspired to cut by that movie?
Zoshka5: probably fewer than the number of lawyers who tried to
get their secretaries to be spanked


That Odd Object of Her Obsession:
DoomGrl: i heard a song today and thought of Oooli, i dont know why


[On the second night incessant summer rain flooded St Mark's
Square and we stood on the edge watching a pair of Venetians
weave their way across by means of two chairs.
'On my back,' I said.
She looked at me in disbelief.
'I can't walk on water but I can wade through it,' and I took
off my shoes and made her carry them while we stumbled slowly
across the wide Square. Her legs were so long that she had to
keep hitching them up to stop them trailing in the water.
When we reached the other side I was exhausted.
'This is the boy that walked from Moscow,' she taunted.
We linked arms and went in search of supper and after supper
she showed me how to eat an artichoke.]



Running the Gamut:
DoomGrl: christina ricci from casper the friendly ghost to
black snake moan to penelope

So There:
Godwit935: Good for you, Harry. I'm different.

Godwit the Enforcer:
Jam7604801: wit did you toss any shelfers the other night?
Godwit935: Jam, none that behaved.

Godwit Strikes Out Again:
Godwit935: Dang it, what is the matter with her.
Godwit935: I don't know what else to do. I have tried to be
nice to her.
Forkrerereredux: you're too forward. you need to play hard to get
Creepy Loner: Pay her no mind, Godwit...the white-lipstick gang
is ready to pick up where she left off.
Creepy Loner: [flexing]
Godwit935: I know what she needs.
Anais3233: lol
Fleurdelochi: >whorf<
Anais3233: a good talking down to!
Creepy Loner: Pepper spray?
CordialCactus: whorf?
Fleurdelochi: "i know what she needs" = >whorf<
Tammynet: godwit, telling her she is lying about squirrels
falling is not being nice
OooliLovesGodwit: godwit, women dont like to be called broads
Godwit935: Tammy, there's only so much bs a man can absorb.
CordialCactus: i saw a chipmunk fall out of a tree
Tammynet: why would she lie about that godwit?
Godwit935: I draw the line at falling squirrels

Lost Arts:
Fleurdelochi: speaking in whole sentences seems to be a nearly
lost art
CordialCactus: and text messaging and email has sounded the
death knell of good penmanship
CordialCactus: i just like saying that


AOL as Narcotic:
AnonyMitch: when i sign off, i become alert. when i sign on,
i become sleepy. why is that?

AWOL From the Culture Wars:
Anais3233: OMG mary kate olson is knocked up
Fleurdelochi: get out!
Gypsyjo47: OMG! Who is mary kate olson?

Same Old ...:
Godwit935: No, Fleur, it means I am commenting on the insanity
of this jernt.
Godwit935: This place has become unhinged.

Anti-Panty:
OooliLovesGodwit: well, that's just silly. i'm not wearing panties
CordialCactus: ok, the word panties really insults my dignity, or
diminishes, no, its just annoying

1 of 4 of us is a prude:
OooliLovesGodwit: vaginal rejuvination? what is that
Anais3233: oh, i thought doctored vaginas
Fleurdelochi: an alum douche
Godwit935: These things are better left not talked about.

Gypsy Being Set Up:
Godwit935: Gypsy, are you an Indian?
Creepy Loner: Don't say "yes" unless you think you're ready for the
YOU'RE NOT REALLY AN INDIAN TEST, Gypsy.
Gypsyjo47: Godwit my grandfather was
Creepy Loner: Oh...too late.

Push-ups Coming?:
OooliLovesGodwit: i want my arms to look like jillian michaels' arms

After-Life:
Annie77772: hi..i got a message from AOL that I have been cancelled

Surprisingly Delusional:
Tom Brite: <<<
MacArthur, not MacAuthor, yo!:
Gypsyjo47: I am reading General MacAuthors memoirs
Gypsyjo47: MacAuthor was a great general and a lousy writer

Is There Any Other Kind?:
Prospect26: I spent Thanksgiving in Mexico with my
dysfuctional family.

Godwit Picks Up Things:
AnonyMitch: godwit...the very first time i saw Rose...he was
working for cbs...interviewing queen elizabeth...he picked up some
item from a table in the room...she took it from him and put it
back down...he picked it back up...she put it back
AnonyMitch: this went on at least three times.
Godwit935: Anony, that's a perfect example of his ego.

What Are You Feeding It?:
AmberDevilRay8: Has anyone's computer ever farted and then turned
off by itself?

Overheard at the Video Store:
AmberDevilRay8: In that new Indiana Jones movie, if anyone has seen
it, Indy says "I like Ike" when he thinks he's about to be executed
by a bunch of pinkos...
AmberDevilRay8: ...and I overheard some girl at the video store say
"I can't believe he said that after Hurricane Ike killed all those
people."


Afghan Hotties:
Onimesh: I saw Khalid Hossain when he came to the BN to sign his book
Onimesh: tons of afghan hotties were there...

Rono's World:
Onimesh: in switzerland, EVERYONE VOTES ON EVERY DECISIONS
Fleurdelochi: i'm pondering the difference between rono and
sentient beings
Hadachoke: lol
Onimesh: swiss people
Onimesh: vote everyday...
AnnAsphodel: Swiss cheese
BobsurAuntTom: The Swiss don't even work they're so busy voting.
Onimesh: what right do that
Onimesh: they have to make people that you haven't voted for
BobsurAuntTom: In Switzerland, voting is a paid job.
Onimesh: make ministers, secrateries and such
Onimesh: ?
Onimesh: you never voted for donald rumsfield
Onimesh: he became a
Onimesh: diffense minister
oooolijay: they have good cheese
Onimesh: I am the pioneer
Onimesh: you never voted for the rice woman

Let's Syntax:
AnnAsphodel: Accurate spelling and punctuation turns me on
like Christmas