I am a fool. At this point, if I were a scrupulous
civil servent, I'd resign. If I were a Japanese Admiral,
I'd commit seppuku. If I were a Kellogg's Corn Flake,
I'd be recalled. It's like this: I was totally
taken in by MyndlessChat the last few weeks and
thought he was Rono. I should have known better.
Especially when he started crying WAAAAAAUUUUHHHHHH.
I wanted to cry at some point.
Since this is just a stupid blog, I won't disembowel
myself. I will go on.
I did have a lot of fun posting this week even if
it's not entirely funny. I even included some fake Rono
clips --- more fun than the real Rono.


Chocolate Leads to Excess Adjectives:
WildCIAagent: brb I am getting chocolate.
CordialCactus: what kind of chocolate?
WildCIAagent: Hershey's Extra Dark pure dark chocolate

Variation of Your Mama Joke:
ShadowPhtm: my sister's cat is so fat that when she is on
the sofa it reminds me of the movie "The Blob"


Vice Squad:

CordialCactus: i was asked this question recently and could
not come up with an answer that satisfied me..
CordialCactus: What is your biggest vice?
NoraMcKee525: and?
CordialCactus: and.. i was posing it to you all
CordialCactus: out of nosiness
CordialCactus: and self reflection
OregonDuckHunter: biggest vice = negativity
NoraMcKee525: oh...well, YOU are my bigest vice
CordialCactus: Ha! my dreams have all come true
CordialCactus: im a vice
OregonDuckHunter: i'm too much of a glass 1/2 full type
CordialCactus: wouldnt that be half empty, duck?
OregonDuckHunter: exactly
DinosoreVagina: a half empty duck?
OregonDuckHunter: thats my 2nd vice---ignorance
NoraMcKee525: hmm..guitar hero, alice white lexia (2 for $12),
chocolate fudge poptarts...dr pepper
NoraMcKee525: is there a word limit here?
EmpressZ21: grocery list nora?
CordialCactus: lol no.. feel free to ramble, its cleansing
CordialCactus: no.. the question is.. whats your biggest vice
DinosoreVagina: this room
CordialCactus: i would say this room
EmpressZ21: smoking coffee you people
EmpressZ21: i didnt even have to think about that oh and
coca cola
DinosoreVagina: coffee isn't a vice
OregonDuckHunter: whats your vice Cactus
NoraMcKee525: court tv...margaritas rocks and salt..bath
and body works
NoraMcKee525: sour patch kids...gadgets
NoraMcKee525: colored post-it notes...
CordialCactus: duck.. my vice ...
NoraMcKee525: skee-ball (which should be an olympic sport)

The Wireless Hot Spot:
ShadowPhtm: the wireless hotspot there is no longer
functioning properly and it messes up my trivia game on
wednesday nights
ShadowPhtm: Dino I went there for dinner and then i played a
trivia game at the bar while consuming mass quantities of
Bread and merlot
NoraMcKee525: omg bread and merlot..unbuttoned the pants right
there at the bar, hunh?
DinosoreVagina: so it's a bar, with wireless... nice


Maybe Her Biggest Vice:
CordialCactus: well.. ive almost quit smoking
CordialCactus: the only thing holding me back is i dont want to
quit before my husband does.. it doesn't seem fair.. which now
that i type it sounds really stupid
CordialCactus: my biggest vice is indecision
CordialCactus: yeah
CordialCactus: maybe



Odds and Ends:

Bethliebner: did anyone else hear about the woman who died while
in the elevator?

BlDET: i am not retarded.

DoomGrl: Miley Cyrus claims that she is not a skank

PatientOnion3: you need to chill

Summers Eve L: I love Itchy & Scratchy such senseless happy violence.

Various704: uk rooms suck

Dickenzian: Getting mad dog mean in the politcial chat rooms

Prospect26: I hve constructed a web around my body,

NoraMcKee525: i hate those huggie things!!

Pablo Bigasso: The women in the Spanish soap operas all look
like they're wearing clothes from 1958.




The Fake Rono:
MyndlessChat: before I used to think naguala is the bad one...
but this room can make any sane person insane...
MyndlessChat: you all made naguala a hateful person...because
all of you are stupids
Ooolijay: we're all stupids?
Ooolijay: ha
MyndlessChat: none of you can open up your minds just to bit
to respect others opinions...


ParaMyrrh and the Fake Rono:
ParaMyrrh: I don't vote either not part of the voting cattle
MyndlessChat: the guy at the NY DMV looked at me weird
MyndlessChat: "how can you not want to vote!"
MyndlessChat: his eyes were big!!
MyndlessChat: like ping pon ball
Ooolijay: my eyes are big


Leslie Is Not Done:
LeslieHapablap: creepy loner, you are not on my buddy list.
i feel sad.
Creepy Loner: I've blocked everyone, killed my e-mail, and
trashed my profile.
Creepy Loner: I'm done.
LeslieHapablap: you are not done with me!


The Sunshine Hobbyist:
Creepy Loner: Although my hair's become a bit lighter...
but I've been profoundly bored with the world and taken up
the hobby of ripping apart my yard while the sun is out.
Creepy Loner: That might be playing a role.


Metaphor of the Month:
LeslieHapablap: paramyrrh, i am sorry you have a colostomy bag
of a heart.

Bidet - Still So Misunderstood:
ParaMyrrh: I know Bidet she's my friend I admire her. She is
a good person with a great heart
NoraMcKee525: yes, her greeting of "stfu" just oozes rainbows
and butterflies

Probably Got the FBI:
Various704: i had a friend who called up the hoover helpline and
stated he was a butcher and demanded to know if one of their
machines would suck the skin off a sausage. they hung up on him.


Beysshoes Getting Her Silly On:
Beysshoes: A late night plea:
Onion please don't abandon us for long.
Beysshoes: We are lost without you.
Beysshoes: Peeps are threatening to leave and search for
another chatroom.
Beysshoes: Creepy is nearly in rigor posturing in grief over the
loss of you.
Beysshoes: Even Binky misses you.
Beysshoes: I've found Mauai and even he says he'll sashay his
grass skirted buns back if only you'll return to us.
Beysshoes: Love, Bey
Beysshoes: P.S. Godwit has boycotted McLaughlin Group as a testament
of his undying love for you.
Beysshoes: Baby come back.

Starved for Conversation With Onion Gone:
Anais3233: who wants to see my new bike?
Beysshoes: that sounds too cool. yes anais!!! YEA!



Special Hoohaa Soap:
Creepy Loner: Binx thinks I'm...dirty?
NoraMcKee525: i think you're a doll and i would love to pet you
BinxB91: well, Creeps, you may not be dirty. But you're
not squeaky clean either.
Creepy Loner: Fair enough, Binx...I do draw a line at rubbing
my skin raw....
Creepy Loner: Well, usually. [wink]
Creepy Loner: Perhaps Binx is right. I generally do a
"once-over" kinda job...with soap, of course.
Creepy Loner: That's about it, though.
Anais3233: do you use special hoohaa soap?
NoraMcKee525: creeps do you use that nonlathering zen shampoo?
Creepy Loner: No, Nora...I use some grease-killing lemon shampoo.
Fleurdelochi: i remember lemon fresh cooch

[Martine walked back into the kitchen, dusting off her hands,
and she picked up another carton. I said, "Martine?" and she
said "What?", and I said, "How happily I think on thee."
"Huh?", she said.
But I could tell she knew what I meant.]



Quote Me Hard:
BinxB91: Empress is fucking freaking? hehe
Anais3233: binx swore? ::giggle::
BinxB91: Anais, I was quoting
Anais3233: yes, but you were rubbing your nipples when you were
quoting it


Excess Estrogen:

Dickenzian: Wow, lot of estrogen in here
MsVictoriaLynn1: Empress is Freaking, Fleur is Swearing... Dogs
and Cats living together, TOTAL ANARCHY
Dickenzian: I need golashes
BinxB91: No Thor, No ParaMyrrh, No Onion
Fleurdelochi: onion is more feminine than i am most of the time



ParaMyrrh Being Bad:
Beysshoes: para is IMg me with porn binx
ParaMyrrh: Anais everyone's mad at me because I sent them a short
film titled "Brush Yo Teeth With My Dick, Bitch!"
Catpower777: wait, I'm mad because you didn't send it to me


Out of the Blue:
MsVictoriaLynn1: I actually had someone IM me out of the blue once
with "ON YOUR KNEES BITCH"
BinxB91: try to be happy


Because Leslie Will Believe Anything:
LeslieHapablap: who is bidet?
Beysshoes: jello jilly's cousin



Forever ParaMyrrh:
Catpower777: night
ParaMyrrh: Cat don't forget to Brush Yo Teeth!


The Mysterious Catpower:
Dickenzian: You punks drove Mizzzcat out
Dickenzian: tsk tsk tsk
Beysshoes: cat doesn't tolerate urinal fezz
ParaMyrrh: Cat didn't leave because of Bidet
Dickenzian: Para, tell us about Cat
BinxB91: Para speaks for catpower
Beysshoes: shut up david.
Dickenzian: Go on

Cat's Got Her Tongue:
MsVictoriaLynn1: Cat is VERY sweet
Dickenzian: Who left to be adored by millions?
ParaMyrrh: I only have good things to say about her So I can't
really speak them in a chat room
BlDET: i hope she left because of the sneak attack on me
Dickenzian: Who left to pray the rosary?
BinxB91: sneak attack??? what a whiner
BlDET: they were trying to get rid of cat?
BlDET: oh my
BlDET: how mean
BlDET: how nasty
BlDET: CAT?
ParaMyrrh: Cat is a sweet woman Kind And very courageous it
takes class and courage to be gentle and kind to everyone



Bidet and the Frat Boys:
BinxB91: Bidet's drunk again
BlDET: drunk?
BlDET: i don't drink
BlDET: why pick on me?
BlDET: i just came in to say hello to my friend, kal
Dickenzian: You don't drink?
Dickenzian: Well, that leaves retarded
Dickenzian: She types well for a retard
Fleurdelochi: y'all let me know when the shit settles.
i'ma play solitaire


Name One:
BlDET: there are bible stories about people like you
BlDET: cautionary tales
BinxB91: The Book of Job?


Bidet Going All Moonie:

BlDET: ms vic probably has an artistic soul and a good sense of humor
BlDET: it comes with not fitting in
Beysshoes: bidet being a predator knows who to leave alone. lol
MsVictoriaLynn1: but I am also properly medicated Bidet...LOL
BlDET: what kind of medication?
BlDET: for what?
MsVictoriaLynn1: and I thank you for that Bidet
BlDET: you're medicated because of me?
Dickenzian: Bidet, I'd love to help you out. How did you come in?
BlDET: butt out, dick
MsVictoriaLynn1: Channelling Groucho Marx Dick?
Dickenzian: Get out of my living room Bidet
Dickenzian: You Erma Bombeck clone
Fleurdelochi: oh, c'mon....bombeck was kinda funny
Dickenzian: I didn't like you in 1983
Dickenzian: I like you less now
Anais3233: Someone's on crack here.. wtf is going on tonight?



Binx TOS'ed:

ParaMyrrh: Bey I know Bidet she's my friend I admire her
She is a good person with a great heart
Beardown100: Is Para perverted too
Beysshoes: para you're not a good judge of character. or characterlessness
Dickenzian: If her heart was only as big as her ass
BinxB91: a good person with a great heart?? I bet you say that
to all the fag hags
Beysshoes: binx!
Beysshoes: O
Fleurdelochi: binx >frowning< that is a perjorative term
Dickenzian: Beys don't flash that here
Dickenzian: get a room
Beysshoes: shut up fezz


Dickenzian and High Standards:
Dickenzian: Leave this room for a few months and the cockroaches
think they own it


Prospect as Catalyst:

Prospect26: Beys...i am once again headed to Mexico . I am
determined to be somewhat fluent. And audio suggestions that
I can find at my library
Beysshoes: oh pros. that's so exciting. i'm happy for you chica.
Beysshoes: pros zen is very fluent in spanish.
Prospect26: Zen...you are fluent in Spanish?
Zenchef2006: mas o menos prospect
Beysshoes: zen pros needs tutoring
Zenchef2006: beys, are you litterate in spanish too?
Beysshoes: NO zen. i only learned spanish to bitch in chat
without getting tossed
Beysshoes: i also learned russian and hebrew for those purposes zen
Beysshoes: oh and japanese(binx is trynna teach me)
Zenchef2006: i can say "cheers" in about 12 languages
Beysshoes: oh i only know filthy stuff.
Zenchef2006: stop turning me on beys!!



The Chatless Chat:
Beysshoes: cat ... tem has gone to another book chat. sigh
Catpower777: there is another book chat?
Beysshoes: yah a private one. i tried but nobody would talk with me cat


Imgining a Bad cactus:

Beysshoes: nora what happed to candy?
Catpower777: Bey, she's in the boonies
Catpower777: and desperate for email
NoraMcKee525: she is housesitting in illinois
Beysshoes: so shes housesitting and cannot chat? candy that is?
NoraMcKee525: yes beys i don't understand it all, but she can
access email
Beysshoes: nora, i hope she knows about the nannycams and we
don't see her nekkid ass lolling about the internet next week
Beysshoes: drinking marguaritas
Beysshoes: trynna trap da pizza delivery boys
Zenchef2006: bow chicka wow wow!! beys
Catpower777: I think you got him all hot and bothered, Bey
Zenchef2006: my attempt at bad 70's porno music theme


Prospect Never Learns:
Prospect26: Anyone interested in what's going on in my life?
DinosoreVagina: who what when how and why
DinosoreVagina: tick tock
Catpower777: you left out where, Dino
DinosoreVagina: intentionally
DinosoreVagina: it will eliminate liability
Beysshoes: pros! put down da glass and talk to us!


Hazardous Pillow Fights:

Prospect26: Beys...my son had shoulder yesterday in CA...
I am in NH. I wanted to fly out there but he was adamant.
His girlfriend is a nursing student,
DinosoreVagina: a shoulder? he lost one today?
Beysshoes: are you sure 'twas his shoulder pros? mebbe he
didn't want you to go see what really happed?
Prospect26: Beys...he has dislocated his shoulder many times.
He is a snowboarder. He is a waiter and cannot lift his
trays. He cannot hi-5 or have a pillow fight with his
girlfriend without the shoulder coming out.
Beysshoes: sheesh pros. no hi-5? that will make for a
ruggged life (in arenas that shouldn't concern a mother
tho yes?) oof
DinosoreVagina: you've seen him pillow fight with his girlfriend?
DinosoreVagina: and he lives alone?
Beysshoes: give us his addy pros. me, cat, and gina will go
to him and make him all better. okay?
DinosoreVagina: can't we just go to jamaica and light a candle
for him beys?
Beysshoes: you ruderies. his mama is here so worried ya
selfish beach.
Beysshoes: okay. cat just voted. jamaica and da candle wins

Which Reminds Para:
ParaMyrrh: I have a video of a lady with six large candles
shoved up her hootie lit






Tne Boys ...:

Ooolijay: i'm just in an awful mood
ThePaIeRlDER: julie when im in a bad mood.............
I GET NAKED AND WEBCAM!
ThePaIeRlDER: the problem i encounter though is someone to
webcam me back!
Ooolijay: perhaps a good poop would do the trick
ParaMyrrh: yeah
ThePaIeRlDER: sometimes a good shit is relieving
ParaMyrrh: A good bowel movement is heavenly
ParaMyrrh: can brighten any day
ThePaIeRlDER: unless its real hard and dosnt want to exit
DinosoreVagina: it's amazing what people agree on
Hadachoke: oh no, not poop chat again



More Fake Rono:

MyndlessChat: let's see who else I hate
MyndlessChat: binx
Beysshoes: binx isn't here rono
MyndlessChat: binx's real aname is something like david calghan?
MyndlessChat: binx's personality is like MURDOCK
MyndlessChat: hada is more of a hitler
Beysshoes: no rono. binx's real name is neil cameron.
MyndlessChat: and I myself is like JESUS



What a Concept:
Ooolijay: would you like a hug myndless
Beysshoes: ooji, make sure you wear a body condom


Fake Rono and the Cute Wahine:
MyndlessChat: I have been ignoring bey since it started to come
to this room...which is about three years
Beysshoes: ty so much rono
Beysshoes:
MyndlessChat: but everytime it comes to the room it atleast
mentions my name 20 times


Assertiveness Through Font:

Tallthinjones: julie, beef up the font and assert yourself a
little here, you can't be downtrodden
Ooolijay: better?
MsVictoriaLynn1: indeed Julie, buck up, stiff upper lip and all
that sort of thing
Ooolijay: oh, i like that
Tallthinjones: that's so ity bitty i need a telescope to read it
Ooolijay: okay hold on
Ooolijay: this?
Tallthinjones: i'm going to need Hubble to read you
Ooolijay: you can't read this?
Ooolijay: it's the same font as before
Tallthinjones: only Bey is smaller
MsVictoriaLynn1: try stiffening your LOWER lip, now imagine how
silly you look right now
Ooolijay: can you read this or not?
Tallthinjones: yes, doll
Ooolijay: okay
DinosoreVagina: what happened to oolijay?
Tallthinjones: she's become bold and overbearing


Still More Fake Rono:
MyndlessChat: oneday , when I was in NY, I went to the bronx zoo:
and we were all watching this chimp and we were all luaghing at
it...all of us were men
MyndlessChat: suddenly, a woman came to see what's going on...the
chimp put its finger in its rectum
MyndlessChat: and try to throw the percious thing at her...
MyndlessChat: even animals hate women


Randy Zen:
NoraMcKee525: i love me some tofutti cuties
Zenchef2006: is that my new nickname nora?


Fake Rono Never Ends:
MyndlessChat: in this room, only one man here
Ooolijay: i dont' know
MyndlessChat: I AM THE ONLY MAN HERE
MyndlessChat: rest of you are women!!!!!
KateTheWench: Mynd- is this a problem?
MyndlessChat: I feel suffocared
MyndlessChat: kate, I don't feel comforatable with dumb creatures
Hadachoke: you're suffofucked, myndless
Cigarfreak99: sorry ..I am Bill NOT Monica





CreepyLoner Appropriately Vomits:

WarHorseThor: I have drank enough beer that I nailed a raccoon
DinosoreVagina: the racoon didn't drink enough beer to consent
WarHorseThor: the raccon was already dead
Beysshoes: was it good james?
WarHorseThor: a little sloppy
Beysshoes: you shoulda waited til the rigor set in
Creepy Loner: [vomits]


How Not to Write a Singles Ad:
Beysshoes: what do you do please?
Beysshoes: too nosey?
Tem o Bedlam: Cough, mostly. I'm coming up on my 59th birthday.
Tem o Bedlam: Not that I'm not a hunk and amazingly literate...


She Handed Twenty Dollars for a $2.50 Fare:
Tem o Bedlam: I did know the Chapin brothers, back when I was
in high school.
Beysshoes: i kissed harry on the mouth!!! !
Tem o Bedlam: My then group opened for 'em once.
Beysshoes: omg! ! !
Beysshoes: i adored harry.
Beysshoes: a d o r e d


Hook Up With Thor?:
Tem o Bedlam: We played that about 1966. My assumption is we went
to well deserved oblivion.
Beysshoes: pls don't diminish your artistic gift like that tem.
Beysshoes: if you made it that big, you had gifts.
Beysshoes: now, you're prolly just drinking too much yes?
Beysshoes: hook up with thor. he needs help with his playing.


Beysshoes Can Take It:

WarHorseThor: I cant have an opinion?
Beysshoes: pay up first please
WarHorseThor: or, I can, as long as it is approved by you?
Beysshoes: no. its cover charge james
WarHorseThor: how about, fuck you too?
Beysshoes: wow. that stung. hard.
WarHorseThor: fat chink
Beysshoes: phat is the polite term.
WarHorseThor: chink, when I want to hear from you, I will order
a beer and pat you on your fat ass
Beysshoes: again, phat is the proper term
WarHorseThor: phat, is not a word
Beysshoes: yes 'tis james.
WarHorseThor: maybe in thailand
Beysshoes: nope. "baby phat"
Beysshoes: you are so unhip
Beysshoes: you're like emma. poor thang you.
Tem o Bedlam: I kinda like the Baby Phat, at Phatburger...
Over priced though.
WarHorseThor: you're like emma's feces
Beysshoes: wow. sharp one.


Beysshoes Giving Encouragement:
Tem o Bedlam: I drink too much... For some reason, the me that
comes out is capable of courtesy and decency.
Beysshoes: well, you're not a sociopath prolly.



Didn't Know She Knew Those Words:
Bethliebner: whos the bitch and whos the butch in that relationship


Phezz Teaches Beys About Chicago Politics:
Dickenzian: Well, they got him in ahead of Clinton and have
been donating millions in $10 increments under the names of
homeless and dead guys. What more do you want them to do Beys?



Beating Up Beysshoes:
FoodSIut: chubby checker/ do the no twist
FoodSIut: and it goes like this
Beysshoes: onion guess who i got today at borders?
FoodSIut: a date with binky?
Beysshoes: PYNCHON!
FoodSIut: he works there
Beysshoes: he's at b&n
Beysshoes: stoopid
FoodSIut: pynchon is way over your tiny brain
Dickenzian: And now Beys is off like a ball rolled by a kitten
FoodSIut: pynchon writes meta-fiction
Dickenzian: Lord Lord
Beysshoes: i know. but you can help me homer
Beysshoes: shut up fezz.




Nora's Break-Through:
NoraMcKee525: i figured out how to put a jukebox thing on myspace
NoraMcKee525: it only took 5 hours
FoodSIut: nora, you are THIRTY-EIGHT, you are out of the myspace
demographic



Godwit's Stamp of Approval:

Ooolijay: who is fezz?
Beysshoes: sigh
Creepy Loner: Dick = Fezz.
FoodSIut: fezz is one of the founders of this vapid chatroom
Ooolijay: what's wrong with him again?
Dickenzian: <-----Fezziwhig
Ooolijay: he seems okay to me
Godwit935: Dick is a normal, decent American man, as far as I know.
MsVictoriaLynn1: Fagan
NoraMcKee525: pfft
Beysshoes: ooji, uhm you like rono so ...


Godwit Standards:
Beysshoes: godwit, do you know the bloggers don't know who
charlie rose is ???
Godwit935: Sure, Beys, most of the people in here are ignorant.
Beysshoes: no not here in the chat ... the bookshelf blog godwit
Godwit935: Well, Beys, you can't be the brightest bulb, reading a
blog about this place.


Next Time, Skip Jack 'n the Box:
Dickenzian: I went to the gas station, drycleaners, and super market
today, Godwit, and I'm out almost $300
Godwit935: I know what you mean, Dick. That is what Obama should be
all about, somehow getting more money in the pocket of the
workingman.
Beysshoes: i went to the bookstore, jack in the box ... i'm out 150


Block That Metaphor:
Godwit935: Obama IS more sizzled than steak. He has to get to
brass tacks, and be quick about it.

More Frat Boy Humor:
MsVictoriaLynn1: Dick... go to the A&E Website and check "Cities
of the Underworld"... its pretty fascinating
Dickenzian: Mizz Vick go subterranean yourself


Binx On the Brain:

Bbrolia: Its going to be cool and a nice night to sleep.
Beysshoes: oh bbrolia you sound like binx
Beysshoes: Bb you're interesting where are you?
Bbrolia: I am in OHIO which means good morning ..
Beysshoes: binx you think that's funny?
NoraMcKee525: binx?
Beysshoes: here i was hoping against hope you were onion.
Beysshoes: i think bb is binx nora
Bbrolia: I dont think Im Binx.
ThePaIeRlDER: beys, dont quit yer day job, you aint gonna make
it as a psychic




What's My Line:
Bbrolia: I am a verb!!!
Beysshoes: Bb are you truly verb???
Bbrolia: Yes Bey And I have no choice.
Beysshoes: okay, since we're not in the deux mebbe we can be
friendly yes?
Bbrolia: I have to brush my tooth and go to bed
Beysshoes: BB?
Beysshoes: are you tracee?
ThePaIeRlDER: jesus beys




Jaded Beys:
Jam7604801: bey we had people here
Jam7604801: onion was here for a bit i think
Beysshoes: when do you get to the interesting part jam?
did interesting even hap?
Jam7604801: we talked books
Beysshoes: liar! i dunt believe that jam
Glomawr: what book?
Jam7604801: we did
Jam7604801: at least until onion came in
Beysshoes: HE knows that's not permitted in here jam.



Double Identities:
Jam7604801: and oolijay is jadeddremor
Beysshoes: NOPE jam
Beysshoes: not the same julie
Jam7604801: yep bey
Beysshoes: NOLO
Jam7604801: yes
Beysshoes: ask bobby you ass
Beysshoes: peeps are putting you on jam
Jam7604801: its a old name bey
Jam7604801: she added a o
Beysshoes: whatever. i don't care what you believe
DinosoreVagina: it's not the same julie Jam
Jam7604801: well dino we will see i know how julie and her
names are
Beysshoes: jam stop it. peeps were putting you on ... whoever
was telling you that.
DinosoreVagina: well Jam it won't make even a small difference
to me since I don't honestly care.. however they're two
different people.
Jam7604801: me either dino but i was here 4 years ago i know
Beysshoes: jam. bobby lived with julie. he should know better
than you . so stop it.
Jam7604801: just took me a tonight and alittle questioning to
figure it out
DinosoreVagina: jam...
Various704: im really dino, dino is really bey, bey is really cat.
who is sometimes yoss who pretends to be dan and we are all in
cahoots. just to confuse jam. our nefarious plan has worked.
Jam7604801: beys they still play games


Coincidence:
Beysshoes: he has an exaggerated sense of self.
DinosoreVagina: who's that beys?
DinosoreVagina: teflon jam?
MistressLesty: fucker, that's the name of my friend's new guinea pig
Beysshoes: oh lesty how interesting. tx for sharing that tidbit




Unclear On the Concept:
DinosoreVagina: rono should be put on a greyhound to canada and
given an ipod
DinosoreVagina: just a thought
Various704: can i get on that bus?
Beysshoes: gina. canada is our friend.
DinosoreVagina: sure, but bring a rain slicker
Beysshoes: shame on you chica



You Don't Know About Beys:
PatientOnion3: do you guys talk this way about bin laden behind
his back too?
Beysshoes: oscar, i had a bf that looked egg sackly like
him. gross out.
DinosoreVagina: that is alarming beys
Beysshoes: he was a dark scotsman...backwoods man. yah gina!
Beysshoes: very very tall like that gina. (in my defense)
Beysshoes: lordy i was nuts about him


Politically and Sexcually Incorrect:

PatientOnion3: bey has a white guy fetish
Beysshoes: actually its a jewish fetish but don't get paranoid
on me homer.
Beysshoes: jewish men are the finest lovers i think. except the
emotionally arrested ones like our radish
PatientOnion3: all jewish men are homosexual, because of their
oppressive overbearing neurotic mothers,
DinosoreVagina: you know that's the kind of statement that makes
one wonder if you uh... travel extensively
Beysshoes: nah ah. nolo.
DinosoreVagina: and what exactly you do on vacation



Re-Hashing the Eggs:

Beysshoes: hey empy. what happed to that egg thing? you were
yammering about weeks ago?
EmpressZ21: egg thing
DinosoreVagina: oh yeah that was fun
EmpressZ21: refresh me
Various704: it was
Beysshoes: yah. that egg stuff.
Beysshoes: some party
Beysshoes: for an egg thing
DinosoreVagina: oh laura angry egg
Beysshoes: yes gina!!!
DinosoreVagina: what was that about?
EmpressZ21: i remember that part i dont remember what the egg
thing was though
PatientOnion3: you can't make an omelette without laying some eggs
and they came before the chicken and the horse




The Naked Neighbors Grow Old:
PatientOnion3: now that i don't want to watch them anymore,
the naked neighbors close their blinds
PatientOnion3: they never cook, they never read, they just watch tv
PatientOnion3: no, they live below me
PatientOnion3: they can't see
DinosoreVagina: how do you see them then?
PatientOnion3: i look down
DinosoreVagina: cameras?
DinosoreVagina: mirror
DinosoreVagina: see through floors?
DinosoreVagina: how does it help if they close the blinds then
PatientOnion3: they are about 10 feet lower
Various704: dino, you may not have noticed. but onion tells a
lot of lies.
PatientOnion3: blinds are closed I can't see thru them
DinosoreVagina: not Onion
EmpressZ21: across from him
Beysshoes: oscar. onion merely seasons
PatientOnion3: i think he is a musicians he always plays an air
harp or guitar or sax
Beysshoes: this is all
DinosoreVagina: I need sleep to figure this one out


Who's On Meds and Why:

EmpressZ21: and that's another thing do all you people take meds?
Beysshoes: the ones who should dont empy.
Pablo Bigasso: Only when I come in here.
Various704: i would if they were offered
Beysshoes: the ones who do, run out.
Beysshoes: the ones who get Rx's don't have money or insurance
Beysshoes: so the answer is yes. no. mebbe. nolo. what about you empy?
EmpressZ21: i dont do you?
Beysshoes: of course. i'm in here ain't i?


"we dont judge here":

Beysshoes: oh so your meds are street drugs? its okay.
we dont judge here.
EmpressZ21: nope dont do them either
Beysshoes: then i dont get it. why do you come here if you're not
disturbed or mental cakes?
EmpressZ21: youre cracking me up this morning beys
Beysshoes: oh you think i'm funny? you poor poor thang empy
Pablo Bigasso: She just thinks she's not disturbed.
EmpressZ21: you raise a good point i dont hear voices i dont
have 6 people living in my head im not depressed
EmpressZ21: i dont know why i come here now that i think about it
Beysshoes: well, i don't have 6 peeps in my head either.
in fact i have 6 vacancies


NOT on Meds:
Not Real Me4: somehow my waste paper basket has moved from
one side of the room to another

On Meds?:
Creepy Loner: Holy s**t. This whole day has just been geared
toward f**king me...and not in a pleasurable way.
SemiLitterate: You said that yesterday, Creepy

Needs to Be On Meds:
Anais3233: you guys need to get a room
Anais3233: i can cut the sexual tension with a chainsaw!

But You Have To Skip the Shower:
Anais3233: have you tried the sysco corncake in a tub?
Anais3233: it's unusually good.


Going Beyond:
Anais3233: ok, i have to go do something gross to my husband
Anais3233: he's taken a sleeping pill
Anais3233: what should i do?
Catpower777: that is a scary thought...something Anais considers gross
Anais3233: he's out like he took a roofie

Affection:
NoraMcKee525: i heart target's book section

Doofus In Need of Work:
ItsAwesomeToBeMe: OPRAH tyra banks wendy williams and the women on
the view get paid millions for JUST TALKING
ItsAwesomeToBeMe: any dooofus can do their job


For Want of a Coach:
Simone De Budoir: Gym, did you qualify for Bejing?
ATSGPGymnast20: Not even close! I lost all hope of that dream
in the 6th grade when my parents pulled me out of it cause of
cost and my coach being a jerk


Burn:
Jam7604801: i want to play some pogo but i'm not in the mood yet
DinosoreVagina: is awake a mood?

So There:
NoraMcKee525: arkansas smells terrible
G0BET: manhattan smells terrible


Prospect Trying To Clarify:

Prospect26: So does everyone know who I am and what gender
I am ? I have never made reference to my husband. You all
have refernce to my children, unfortunately.
Summers Eve L: Wait. Hit me one more 'gin with that info,
Prospect. And this time try making sense.
Prospect26: Summers...what part does not make sense?

Denial:
Prospect26: I have no obsession with Lady.
MsVictoriaLynn1: Prospect... you really SHOULD she is quite
pretty
Summers Eve L: hahaha Right, Prospect. And I am a calm person.

Nora Defines:
ParaMyrrh: Hey poop is profound I poop luminous turds that
are elated to heaven ensconced in strange gases unknown to mankind
NoraMcKee525: para..i sense a feces theme tonight
NoraMcKee525: am i warm?
ParaMyrrh: Nora yeah some deep.....
ParaMyrrh: Nora yeah a steaming pile
BinxB91: Nora, para loves feces themes
DinosoreVagina: leave it to nora to spoil the surprise
DoomGrl: its distasteful
NoraMcKee525: haha..i am on FIRE tonight

Victoria Scores:
ParaMyrrh: Only Doom can save me from the Cloacic Demons in my head
MsVictoriaLynn1: Doom is probably not strong enough to pull your
head out of there para


It Could Have Been worse:
BinxB91: That's a favorite trick. Light a kerosene soaked bag
of poop, leave it on someone's door mat, ring the bell and run
BinxB91: The person ends up stomping in poop thinking they're
putting out a fire
BinxB91: the mafia does that when you fall behind on your payments
Summers Eve L: "don't put it out with your boots Ted!"
"Don't tell me my business devil woman!"
Tammynet: stomping is better than stop, drop and roll


Bicycle Thief:
Condorblues: is this old home week in the book shelf?
BlDET: someone complimented me on my bike today
BlDET: and how cheap it was
BinxB91: I saw that movie
BlDET: kinda sad, that person missed out on a good story
BlDET: i sorta stole it, but there was money involved
BlDET: don't bait me

A Fake CreepyLoner:
TacoDreamMachine: the chicken broasting has tired me out
[flops back down]
Beysshoes: did creeps go and shack up with our onion gina?
TacoDreamMachine: I am creepy, onion is history
DinosoreVagina: maybe she ate him?
Tammynet: thought he was a lima bean
Bethliebner: like some female of the species who eat their
mates after sex


Affection:
Fleurdelochi: hada...>poke<
Hadachoke: >perk<