I'VE GOT A POCKETFUL OF SUNSHINE
--- Natasha Bedingfield


The Ashtray Girls:

Muerte Barbie: Creep.
Creepy Loner: Hm?
Muerte Barbie: What's the name of that website? Boing Boing?
Creepy Loner: Yeah, I think so...
Muerte Barbie: There's some stuff I want to buy you from there.
Creepy Loner: But I don't really want "stuff" anymore...
Muerte Barbie: But...
Creepy Loner: [raised brow]
Muerte Barbie: A cermaic gun shaped ashtray.
Creepy Loner: That's not necessary, Barbie. I've managed to steal
about 10 crystal ashtrays from my grandparents...which they never
used.
Muerte Barbie: I have cool casino ashtrays I've stolen.
Creepy Loner: I have some cheesy ashtrays, too.
Creepy Loner: I'm most fond of the expensive ones that I ripped
off of loved ones, though.


Music Discussion:

WarHorseThor: axel rose is a no talent hack
Likesgarters1: not true
Huckelberry68: Why do you say that, War?
Fleurdelochi: because he knows all there is to know
about music
Uqtipie: no talent.????
Likesgarters1: he is a scum bag. but a talented one
DoomGrl: guns and roses made many good songs
DoomGrl: and had great art work on there albums
WarHorseThor: he sounds like ethel merman with down syndrome

Russian Symbolists Discussion:

BooksIut: The Russian Symbolists talk about going to
masquerades and becoming different people simply by wearing
different masks.
BooksIut: A young boy wears a geisha costume.
BooksIut: They change, two, three times throughout a ball.
Overman714: I think everyone should walk around with elaborate
masks during the day.
Overman714: People would be more interesting that way.
BooksIut: That's sort of like what I want to experience ---
self-creation and remoldification.
BooksIut: But on a monthly basis.
Fleurdelochi: i prefer a rhinocerous cunt mask


Not Getting the Cereal Game:

Creepy Loner: [flops back down, w/ hummus]
BinxB91: [flopped down with a bowl of cereal]
Rafo65: notices that cactus has a green font
Anais3233: what?
CordialCactus: notices rafo noticing font
Rafo65: ?tahw
CordialCactus: i know!
Rafo65: notices cordial's low-cut font
CordialCactus: you give us hints about your cereal....
and we shall guess it...
CordialCactus: name that cereal!
CordialCactus: GO
Creepy Loner: Let's see...
Creepy Loner: Grape Nuts.
Rafo65: Cheerios
Rafo65: Wheaties
BinxB91: Total and Granola
CordialCactus: that is not a hint


That Reminds Me:

Max 314159265358: Have you heard of the Lonsome Loser?
Fleurdelochi: heard of him?
Fleurdelochi: hell, i married him


What are you listening to?:

WildCIAagent: I'm listening to my son run on the running machine.
PatientOnion3: I am listening to my naked neighbors chop garlic
and chase their cats

Entrance:
CordialCactus: fair to middlin... you know.. if crickets carried
uzies.. toads wouldnt EFF with em;'

Extended Bumper Sticker:
Creepy Loner: "If at first you don't succeed, try try again. After
that, give up. There's no reason to be an *sshole about it."


"I knew you were a chick":
Rafo65: oh, dear.. a bit late for me, as I have to be up at 6
Rafo65: crumbs
CordialCactus: and speckles
Fleurdelochi: pobracito
CordialCactus: see you later
KammaToasted: "oh, dear"....i knew you were a chick
Rafo65: and with so many cute chicks in the room and all... sigh
Fleurdelochi: utterly fabulous


"is this a euphemism?":

Creepy Loner: I need to do an "important study"...get a fat grant
or five...and then move to Argentina.
CordialCactus: is this an euphemism?
Creepy Loner: Yes.
Fleurdelochi: argentina
CordialCactus: a or an
WildCIAagent: an
Fleurdelochi: richard shindell lives there
PatientOnion3: they have great beef there
CordialCactus: thanks cia! are you sure?
WildCIAagent: It was before a word with a vowel...???
Rafo65: argentines are italians who speak spanish and wish they
were english
Fleurdelochi: it melted down into the falklands


I Am So Lonely:
CordialCactus: im new in my town.. i really need some new town
friends... will you all move here, please?

[In the past month I have gone on dates with nine
different men. They have all either cute and smart but not
funny, cute and funny but not smart, or funny and smart but
not cute. Or cute and smart and funny but not attracted to
me. These are the ones I hate the most. My unfavorite
quote from an e-mail: "i should admit to you that my
attraction to you is purely platonic, but needn't hinder us
from pursuing a friendship, if that is not outside your
agenda." Outside my agenda, indeed. I hate you and will
laugh and laugh when you arrive in that special circle of
hell reserved for people who don't capitalize the first-
person singular pronoun. Ha, ha, ha. That's me laughing.]


Vibrator Part I:

Jam7604801: creepy i just read a funny true story that reminded
me of something you would do maybe
Creepy Loner: Oh God, I can only imagine.
Jam7604801: this lady in london bought a pair of pleasure panties
they have a built in vibrator well she wore them to the grocery
store got so excited while shopping fainted and fell and hit her
head knocked her out when the emts got there
Jam7604801: they found her pleasure panties still viberating
Creepy Loner: -- has used a vibrator...has fainted in public...
hasn't done both at once.
DinosoreVagina: there's an ad for duracell


Vibrator Part II:

Creepy Loner: You did remind me of something funny, Jam...
Creepy Loner: Funny memory.
Creepy Loner: I had a vibrator that I just loved...it was perfect.
Creepy Loner: And it was long-lived too...but, all good things
must end, and one day it just wouldn't run. I changed the
batteries, talked to it, hit it a few times...nothing.
Creepy Loner: So, I threw it in the trash...which I had just
changed...so there it sat in the bottom of the can...dead.
Creepy Loner: A couple of days pass and I go out with my mom to
shop, etc...we come back...and the can is buzzing.
Fleurdelochi: like the chicken in "just before the war with the eskimos"



Same Old Same Old:

Godwit935: It's a disgrace to NPR that they let that Ira Glass
continue his shows without ever admitting or acknowledging that
the stories on his show are fiction.
Max 314159265358: they are?
Godwit935: Why is that, that Ira Glass gets away with telling lies
and presenting them as truth?
Max 314159265358: he's a gay Jew?
Godwit935: It's a good question, you must admit, Max.

Same Old Same Old:
BooksIut: I seem to have an ingrown hair on my right vaginal lip.


The Trouble With Harry:

KD81785: Yall are so much brighter than Authors Lounge
KD81785: Other than the Harry Potter fixation
Lamumsie: who has a harry potter fixation?
Creepy Loner: Someone here has a Harry Potter fixation?
SemiLitterate: (looking around for HP fixated people)
(not finding any)

Baroque Opera:
KD81785: I am really stupid, I thought onion was a girl and
creepy was a boy
Creepy Loner: Don't feel too bad, KD...Onion and I often make
the same mistake.

Remains of the Day:
Creepy Loner: [flops back down with a lemon tart and a box of
blackberries]
Catpower777: that sounds very english, Creepy
Creepy Loner: You just made me realize that this would be even
better with a lot of tea...
Creepy Loner: Which I'm too lazy to get.
Catpower777: ring the help


Beth on The Wire:
Bethliebner: i was in baltimore
ThePaIeRlDER: doin what beth?
Lamumsie: did you go for fun,Beth?
Bethliebner: at a porn script writers conference


Still Crazy After All These Years:
Blmonk912: i've been on for ten minutes and these people are up
in arms already


Monk on MySpace:
Blmonk912: has anyone gone to my myspace profile yet?
Blmonk912: if so, please comment on it
ViolaPlayer257: no
Blmonk912: myspace.com/mm912


BlueMonk Ages But the Girls Stay 16:

ManiacEyeball: viola are you under 18
ViolaPlayer257: yesh
ManiacEyeball: oh?
ManiacEyeball: how much younger?
ViolaPlayer257: 18-2
ViolaPlayer257: =D
ManiacEyeball: she's sweet sixteen
Blmonk912: viola, do you wear a tampon during the day for
protection and a pad at night for comfort?
ViolaPlayer257: who?
ViolaPlayer257: ....what a weird question!


Still Not Out:
Blmonk912: i type in bluemonk or some other name every few months
and find funny stuff
Blmonk912: still too embarrassed about the whole thing to share
that crap with friends and family


The Kid Hangs in There:

Blmonk912: viola, ever been in an accident on a bicycle?
ViolaPlayer257: yes monk i have
Blmonk912: viola, are you okay?
ViolaPlayer257: ...yesh i was answering your question
Blmonk912: viola, ever suck a dead dog's you-know-what?
Djokerdjoker316: THATS WRONG DUDE
ViolaPlayer257: you are the weirdest person i have ever come
in contact with while in a chat room
Blmonk912: that's probably my favorite question
Blmonk912: viola, why did you change your font?
ViolaPlayer257: because
TravisMMVII: Monk, were you wearing a helmet when you fell head
first over the handlebars?
Blmonk912: makes you look like some guy who made up a little
indian girl persona to turn on middle-aged men
BinxB91: Viola, Monk doesn't bother you because you have
experience with this type of male?
ViolaPlayer257: no i just have "friends" that are just like that
Billw0314: we were just admiring your composure, viola
BinxB91: exactly, Bill
Blmonk912: viola, what is your mother's alcoholic beverage of choice?


Flirting:

Catpower777: Binx by day?
DinosoreVagina: hi Binx
BinxB91: (sigh) day off
BinxB91: and I annoyed everyone in Romance chat rooms
BinxB91: or was annoyed by them
Catpower777: what goes on in romance chat?
DinosoreVagina: hard to imagine
BinxB91: flirting
Catpower777: poetry recitation?
DinosoreVagina: oh is Jam there?
Catpower777: lol, Dino
BinxB91: a lot of sexual innuendo
BinxB91: which is not really innuendo
Catpower777: so what's different from here, binx?
DinosoreVagina: good question
BinxB91: uhm ...
BinxB91: we don't flirt
Catpower777: some do
DinosoreVagina: have you seen this place at night
BinxB91: no one here expects to get a date out of it
DinosoreVagina: ok it's not good flirting
Catpower777: oh, romance moves into real life?
DinosoreVagina: I'm surprised they don't get an STD out of it
BinxB91: Well, if someone expects to get a date here, pummel 'em


Baby Boom and other Booms:

Phronsie: Well, according to some literature going around on
the internet, a baby boom among the non-muslim popularion is
what is needed
Phronsie: to counter the constant birth rate among the muslim
population
RQSGuy: Why does that matter? We still have bigger bombs and
faster planes.


Miles to Go:
Bethliebner: the people who vandalized robert frosts house are
going to have to take classes in his poetry


Group Work:

Plezantdreams: oh yeah... trust me, I got screwed in my
business transactions drafting class
Plezantdreams: one girl did all the edits, and me and this other
guy did all the writing, it sucked
McLaryn5508: the minute I heard "group" I just slouched down in
my chair


My mama said:

McLaryn5508: My mama always said, "Honey, if you don't have
somethin' nice to say about someone, well then, you just come
sit down right here with me."
BD Radical84: and how would that help McLar?
Plezantdreams: BD, that's when her Momma got out the duct tape


Hates the Roosevelts, Loves Bookslut:
Plezantdreams: I hate the Roosevelts. They freaking ruined this
country with federalist intervention. OY VEY!
Plezantdreams: I rather like Bookslut...
Plezantdreams: reminds me of someone fingering all of the books
in one row in the library, you know the type...


Bookslut SCORE:

BinxB91: why the "oy vey"? I doubt you're Jewish
BD Radical84: do you have to be jewish to say "oy vey"
Plezantdreams: Binx, I am Jewish. Why would you doubt I was?
BooksIut: Plez, because Jews are intelligent


Vomiting One's Soul:

BD Radical84: I even bet if creepy was in my area, she wouldn't
want to get to know me or meet me offline ^-_-^
Creepy Loner: BD...are you at death's door, wealthy, and
willing to adjust your will?
BD Radical84: I have no self esteem I mean I always got the
"let's be friends" crap or the "Your not my type" I get rejected
through one excuse to another
Creepy Loner: [raised brow]
Fleurdelochi: are you vomiting your soul on the chatroom floor?

[As I came back to my seat between Rob and Louis, the
man onstage said, "I pray that those that are frozen with fear
would get the strength to come up to the front and pray." I
felt that Louis, who had not moved a muscle, might be among the
frozen. He was leaving tomorrow, to go back to a life in which
he had to deal with his ex-wife and his career dissatisfaction
and his bad hair, with selling his condo at a loss, with not
knowing anybody like him. The bond these people felt with one
another may have been dysfunctional, but they were part of a
community all the same, and that community was about to be rent
asunder. I put my hand on Louis's neck and kept it there. He
started crying, or maybe he'd already been crying and he was just
more obvious about it now. After awhile Rob put his head down in
his arms. I couldn't tell whether he was crying or not. I put
my hand on his back and held it there. I asked whatever forces
there might be in the universe to have mercy on the three of us,
and everybody in the room. If there's any way for my
goodwill to help these two men, I thought, then let it help them.]


Been there, Done that:
Prospect26: I do not do suicide. Been there. Done that. Rode in
the ambulance. Watched the stomach being pumped out. Waited for
the Grandfather who never came.



BIDETKITTY- More Lives Than Jason:

Moonmet: bidet has taken over the lounge, poisoning it as we type
ThePaIeRlDER: bidet is a pougue ass mofo
Anais3233: bidet is like a seagull
Beysshoes: yes anais ... a vulture
Moonmet: more like a black widow
Anais3233: she flies in, squaks a lot, shits all over everyone and
squaks some more
Anais3233: squak squak squak



Shelf Standards:

Creepy Loner: [head slowly falls back, mouth falls open,
loud snoring begins]
Fleurdelochi: ok, 5 bucks to the first person to land a marshmallow
in her mouth
Various704: how much for a piece of dry dog shit?
Fleurdelochi: various, stop. we have standards here



Odds and Ends:

B00KGASM: Oh, oh. Now he's offering to inseminate my nose.

WildCIAagent: My feet are hot.

SCiSsoRzrOck3rXD: has anyone here ever listened to stairway
to heaven backwards

B00KGASM: I'm the proud owner of "The (Big) Book of
International Erotica."

Gypsyjo47: I hate to sound like a tightass, but the only sport
I can watch is ice skating

CordialCactus: my kids saw the ice cream truck for the first time
ever, today... now they KNOW.. we chased it 8 blocks

Phronsie: Well, it's after 5. I wonder who has killed whom in
Birmingham today.

Tammynet: my friends parrot flies at you lands on you then says
"you wanna piece of this" it is hysterical





Bullets Over Broadway:

Phronsie: I hadn't watched any of the dancing things while
daughter was gone
Phronsie: guess I'm going to have to bite the bullet again
WildCIAagent: THE bullet?
BinxB91: oh, I don't mind watching mindless TV shows if it's something
to be shared
Phronsie: The bullet in terms of watching stuff that kind of bores me
BinxB91: Don't worry, agent. She uses blanks
WildCIAagent: ahhh
Phronsie: And I can work puzzle books while I watch
Phronsie: that helps a lot
WildCIAagent: It might be more of a thrill if not blanks.
WildCIAagent: I do sudoku on line while watching.
BinxB91: I can read mindless magazine articles while watching
mindless TV shows
Phronsie: Wild, it would be very inconvenient for everyone if
I died right now


Regular:

Phronsie: By regular, I mean a job that offers dull continued
employment, with hope of advancemnt
Phronsie: medical plans, pension plans, etc.


Her Imaginary Friend:
Prospect26: Lady...i wish you were here...great
news about my daughter...


Gotta Spend It to Make It:
Phronsie: I got my first royalty check from iUniverse today.
Phronsie: I think it's mostly based on books that I myself have
ordered from them


Three Workouts:

Fleurdelochi: i was very ambitious today
BinxB91: oh?
Fleurdelochi: i went to the gym BEFORE work
BinxB91: I was ambitious too
BinxB91: I went running on hilly country roads
Creepy Loner: I went to the gym. I ran around. I got sick of
running around and took a shower. I rolled a cigarette
in the locker room and got more funny looks. Then I left.


June Bug Jams:

CordialCactus: im going to take this moment to restate something
that i do not like
CordialCactus: June bugs
Creepy Loner: Hm.
Creepy Loner: Oh yes.
Creepy Loner: Another bonding point - I hate the f*ckers, too.
Fleurdelochi: june bugs are COOL
Fleurdelochi: you can take six or ten of them and tie them to a
paper plate with thread
Fleurdelochi: make a ufo


Hair (c)lip:

CordialCactus: im still an 80's hair girl at heart
CordialCactus: i cant get it to be poofy on top anymore
Fleurdelochi: southern belles creed.....
Fleurdelochi: "the higher the hair, the closer to god"


Word Joy:

Q4Omega: some courtships are euphemisms for hurtships
Zilo Chatta: so that's how you spell euphemisms
Q4Omega: yeah, since learning its spelling, i've been shamelessly
using the word every chance i get
CordialCactus: euphemism has a cousin twice removed.. colloquialism


Especially the Ear rings:

Gypsyjo47: I saw a black woman yesterday who had a buzz haircut
....if she didn't have a big ass and tits and ear rings I wouldn't
have known she was a woman

Mountain People:
Prospect26: Lady...one is a skiier and one is a snowboarder.
They have been on the mountain since birth.

But Once the Bleeding Stopped ...:
SCiSsoRzrOck3rXD: a couple months ago i got stigmata confused
with stigma

Most Surprising Line:
B00KGASM: I wish there was football on.

Dared:
Gypsyjo47: Let's either talk about pussy or literature...
either one is okay with me!
BinxB91: how about pussy literature then?
Prospect26: I have a degree in English Lit///what is pussy
literature?
Prospect26: (dare I ask?)
CordialCactus: she dared!

Quest:
EmilySerenity: Is there anyone I can talk to who is of the age
of 18, no higher then 21, male, maybe from texas, respectful
to women and not a pervert?



Who Can Count When In Love:

B00KGASM: I thought House of 10,000 Corpses was adorable.
Creepy Loner: Goodness, Slut - you've increased the body
count by 9,000!



BLT Charming :

WarHorseThor: want to hear an interesting anecdote?
WarHorseThor: well, I spent the whole evening verbally pursuing
a woman who claimed to be an english teacher, my fantasy
WarHorseThor: and
WarHorseThor: we were in this romantic private room
WarHorseThor: I was on my best behavior
CordialCactus: i made out with my high school nations in the news
sub teacher
WarHorseThor: then she tells me "if you wanted to ask me questions,
than you wouldn't have waited"
WarHorseThor: than
WarHorseThor: she used than instead of then
WarHorseThor: so I questioned her
CordialCactus: that killed the mood, i bet
WarHorseThor: english teachers dont make that mistake
Anais3233: maybe she made a typo
BinxB91: maybe she is a bad English teacher
WarHorseThor: anais, she was homely and misshapened, just like I
like them, I thought I had the right one
WarHorseThor: and she got nasty
WarHorseThor: you would think that a fat, ugly english teacher
wouldnt be hard to snag, but jesus, I cant seem to find my mojo
Jam7604801: good english teacher bad typer maybe
WarHorseThor: shut the fuck up jam
Jam7604801: nah
Fleurdelochi: now THAT'S his best behavior
BinxB91: WarHorse, rub one out. It'll make you lighten up
Anais3233: ::applauding:: i agree
Jam7604801: ILoveGoodBeer you couldn't make me shut it if you tried
WarHorseThor: you would think that a fat, ugly english teacher
WarHorseThor: im not entirely hideous
Anais3233: war, i'd imagine in person you could charm anyone.


Jam and BLT with Onions:

Jam7604801: i could tell you Rox but you wouldn't really want to know
WarHorseThor: im sure jam has emailed you all the specifics
FoodSIut: jam, what are you wearing?
Fleurdelochi: (plotting to steal creepy's floss)
WarHorseThor: just a big lesbian fuckshow
FoodSIut: he's all sweaty and has mint leaves pasted to his
muscular behemothism
Fleurdelochi: (chortles)
Fleurdelochi: leave the behemoth out of this, damnit
FoodSIut: jam is covered in blue chortles and fresh mint leaves
LadyMtnMedic: nobody has emailed me anything thank the heavens,
not sure I want to know...
Jam7604801: baron the funny think about your comment when i do
talk to Rox i don't think i ever mention you at ALL
Jam7604801: you loser
FoodSIut: the pretty blue chortles match befree's green eyes
FoodSIut: what a combination!
Fleurdelochi: wait until you see the topping
WarHorseThor: jam has the centerfold of this months hustler
magazine pasted over his flacid boy part with 10w30
FoodSIut: do i melt the butter using jam's smile or his breath?
Jam7604801: like me and Rox would sit around talking and emailing
about you
WarHorseThor: jam, you are worse than any sixth grade class
FoodSIut: Jam's pair of granitey rox are swaying in the chortled
breeze of the angry tornado
CordialCactus: blech
FoodSIut: it's a chortle kind of night
Fleurdelochi: which was, curiously, gray-green
FoodSIut: what is a chortle?
WarHorseThor: lady, I am going now, do you want any other songs
before I go?
Fleurdelochi: a delicious sort of laughter
CordialCactus: i thought it was a laugh
FoodSIut: oh, something you invented?
LadyMtnMedic: yes if you really dont mind, I have two....
LadyMtnMedic: please?
WarHorseThor: ok
Fleurdelochi: no....a for real and truly word
FoodSIut: not from dr. seuss and horton?
Fleurdelochi: nope
LadyMtnMedic: It's Not My Time - 3 Doors Down and
LadyMtnMedic: What Hurts the Most - Rascal Flats
FoodSIut: I have a horrible hangover, quick give me a couple chortles
over easy and a V8


Banana berry Ice Cream:

Zenchef2006: i made my first batch of banana berry ice cream today
Zenchef2006: and i gotta say it turned out pretty darn good
Zenchef2006: should be set and hardened by tomorrow i'm gonna
serve it with tempura fried plantaines and hazelnut mocha sauce
CordialCactus: fleur.. i dont know.. but there is almost potential
under that someday, I too, will be secure enough in myself to not
be constantly niggling veneer
Befree655321: better to make apple yogurt cream
CordialCactus: zen.. reading that.. just a sec
Befree655321: i want to make real yogurt
Befree655321: someone teach me THAT
CordialCactus: omg hazelnut mocha sauce
Fleurdelochi: zen
Zenchef2006: yes fleur???
Fleurdelochi: to hell with the teryaki sauce
Fleurdelochi: i'm yours
CordialCactus: lol
FoodSIut: I know what boys like
CordialCactus: aw.. and we were here for that.. saweet
Fleurdelochi: yeah
Fleurdelochi: me too
Zenchef2006: hehehehehe hey just wait till i make the
frangelico and baileys flavored gelatto served with amaretto
soaked ladyfingers
Fleurdelochi: stop it
CordialCactus: argh
FoodSIut: you can get pregnant from that
Fleurdelochi: i'm getting flustered
CordialCactus: oh.. i snorted
Zenchef2006: i used to serve it with candied almonds but that
made it a bit over the top
Fleurdelochi: >moaning<


Cleaning the Fish Tank:

FoodSIut: i was cleaning my fish tank with a weed whacker,
the glass broke, piranha everywhere, my cats ran up the
bookcases, knocking over all my bibles signed by god
FoodSIut: just a regular day though
AA Birthday Pony: i have a bible signed by little richard
FoodSIut: tutti fruiti
Ictia07: why clean a fishtank with a weed whacker
FoodSIut: he's my favorite homosexual
FoodSIut: cuz the seaweeds were overgrown
B00KGASM: I love pink.
Ictia07: must be a huge fishtank
FoodSIut: damn i hate typing high on contaminated tomatoes


Going Barefoot In the Dark:

AA Birthday Pony: no socks = lyme disease!
AA Birthday Pony: yee haw!
CordialCactus: evie.. they just arent at the same cuteness
level as flip flops though
CordialCactus: no?
Jennifer Payne: that's right pony
Sleepy Eyed Evie: depends CC
WarHorseThor: evie, I do, and thats what is important, after all
AA Birthday Pony: amen to that
Sleepy Eyed Evie: i've seen cute ones
Jennifer Payne: or a splinter at the very least
Sleepy Eyed Evie: I usually wear the toe ones because the toe thing
doesnt bother me and they stay on better
WarHorseThor: Jennifer, do you have pretty feet?
AA Birthday Pony: i always have dreams that i'm being chased by wolves
and i'm wearing flip flops.
Sleepy Eyed Evie: I should probably wear something with a heel
because i'm short but i'm not into it
Jennifer Payne: they are pretty cool feet
AA Birthday Pony: no feet are pretty
CordialCactus: long or short toes?
WarHorseThor: Good Jennifer
Jennifer Payne: i don't have talons or anything
Sleepy Eyed Evie: I have small feet.
B00KGASM: Likewise.
B00KGASM: What size?
Sleepy Eyed Evie: I guess they are ok. How do you tell if you
have good feet or not?
AA Birthday Pony: i've got retractable claws
Jennifer Payne: that's hot
B00KGASM: I can fit into a little girl's sandal, sized 4.
CordialCactus: evie.. i think you just know
WarHorseThor: I am not one of those foot perverts that wants
to do dirty things to your feet, I just like to look and maybe
touch a little
AA Birthday Pony: no wait, that's marvel anti-hero wolverine.
Sleepy Eyed Evie: hm. i guess i do then
Jennifer Payne: lol
AA Birthday Pony: i knew a girl who had webbing between her
big and second toe.
WarHorseThor: wolverine feet, nice
AA Birthday Pony: it was.........
Jennifer Payne: if your toenails don't look like Fritos, you have
pretty feet
AA Birthday Pony: it was a deal breaker
WarHorseThor: pony, that is common in england, webbed feet
AA Birthday Pony: bad teeth, check, webbed toes check
Sleepy Eyed Evie: ok then i have pretty feet.
Sleepy Eyed Evie: +l
AA Birthday Pony: that's not a girl that's swamp thing yo
B00KGASM: I broke one of my toes a couple months ago and ever
since, it's been hook-shaped.
WarHorseThor: actually, pretty feet have to have many qualities
B00KGASM: Sometimes it freaks me out.
Sleepy Eyed Evie: how did you break it?
CordialCactus: lets hear them, thor
Jennifer Payne: couldn't you just fix the web thing with some
scissors and a little neosporin?
B00KGASM: I fell down the stairs.
WarHorseThor: ok
B00KGASM: With my laundry basket.
AA Birthday Pony: she had, like, no chin either
CordialCactus: jenn.. ew ow.. ew
FoodSIut: YOU WERE PUSHED BY YOUR MOTHER BOOK SLUT
Sleepy Eyed Evie: i cracked one of my toes on a carpet cleaner
and it hurt like hell
Sleepy Eyed Evie: but i dont think i broke it
B00KGASM: Ew, Evie.
B00KGASM: That sounds hella painful.
Jennifer Payne: pony dated Swamp Thing!
AA Birthday Pony: it was like making out with ms. pac man
CordialCactus: LOL
Sleepy Eyed Evie: it was
Sleepy Eyed Evie: I wanted to slap the carpet cleaning


Beysshoes Cross-Examined:

Beysshoes: anybody home?
Anais3233: barely
PatientOnion3: bey, you turned binky gay, DOES THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY?
Anais3233: are you binxes lover?
Beysshoes: anais! yay!
Beysshoes: binx is my fake boyfriend why do you ask?
Anais3233: i thought she was binx's lover?
PatientOnion3: that's how she turned him gay

[On the crosstown bus one evening a boy of eight or nine
leaned forward and spoke to me from across the aisle. "What
are you knitting?" he piped.
In addition to dreading the question, I also hate children.
One would think that these two facts in combination should
have inspired me on this cold December night to a stony
silence, but I was feeling generous. "A baby blanket," I
answered condescendingly, glad to broaden the waif's
horizons.
He sat back in his seat. "I just finished a scarf," he said
primly, "in fisherman's rib. Now I'm working on a Fair Isle
sweater, but I have to hurry if i'm going to finsih by
Christmas."
Once I recovered my equilibrium, I responded. "That sounds
terrific. Good luck."
What I wanted to say was, "Does your mother know how gay
you are?"]




What I Heard:

Anais3233: i heard there was a purse sized laptop for three
hundred bucks out there
ThePaIeRlDER: out where anais?
Beysshoes: anais, truly??? wow
PatientOnion3: i heard there's an elephant sized hammock for fat texans



The Bathroom Thief:

Summers Eve L: I'm stealing your toilet paper.
Summers Eve L: And paper towels.
Summers Eve L: And tampons.
Summers Eve L: But you can keep your identity.
Summers Eve L: I looked up your credit.
Summers Eve L: Whew.
Summers Eve L: bahaha
EmpressZ21: yeah i dont want your identity either

Pranksters:

Beysshoes: pale you jack ass ... its so good to see you
in true form lololllll
Summers Eve L: It was a JOKE!
Babigurl10155: lol you guys are great
Phronsie: You've been listening to too much gangsta rap.
Summers Eve L: I don't know where you live!
Anais3233: i was putting my tampons under my pillow
EmpressZ21: hahahaha
EmpressZ21: okay through the window Pale
EmpressZ21: get the tampons go go GO



What Do You Come Here For?:
Frommetoeternity: various things, but i mostly found the room
alluring for my attraction to witty conversation