Welcome The Girls Of Summer ---
Fleurdelochi, Melodramamama22, Summers Eve L


If Only Elaine Were Here:
Rafo65: merde-o-rama... this room is like Seinfeld..
a room about nothing.


LiarFace:

Summers Eve L: Hi LiarFace
FoodSIut: Hi DodgeBall Busty Goddess
FoodSIut: My Name is FictionFace, i had it legally changed
Summers Eve L: Oh yeah? Well I forgot to file the formal
paperwork. So, LiarFace it is.

Forever Silly:
FoodSIut: seven of my culinary romance novels have been
published and made into food network sitcoms


Announcement:
Q4Omega: i'm not here or any other chatroom looking for a
woman anymore

Sobering Up:
Summers Eve L: I'm having trouble following the conversations
in here all of a sudden.


BLT at War:
Beysshoes: james you were in desert storm?
WarHorseThor: BEY, I WAS IN BEIRUT
WarHorseThor: I KILLED 5
FoodSIut: an hour?
WarHorseThor: A WOMAN AND 4 KIDS
MsVictoriaLynn1: damned Sand Fleas
ParaMyrrh: War was the terror of Lebanon: the "Beirut Butcher"
Fleurdelochi: he was the chuck norris of beruit?


Chat Routine:
Fleurdelochi: i talk about people until binx yells at me

Confession:
WarHorseThor: beys, I am scared
WarHorseThor: scared to trust

Still the Beaver:
IM0Kurknot: Why is it that I get the feeling that someone with
a screen name of WarHorse Thor is probably as runty and nerdy
as they come?
WarHorseThor: imo, suck the snotty end of my fuckstick nancy boy
Fleurdelochi: now THERE'S the thor we know and love


Brotherhood of War:
ParaMyrrh: War I stood up for you while you were gone
Beysshoes: james and david sitting on a tree.


"whatcha gonna do?":
Fleurdelochi: whatcha gonna do, horseface....fuck us into
submission?


Godwit's Bet:
Godwit935: Did anyone see Meet the Press today, by the way?
Godwit935: I bet not one person in here saw Meet the Press today.
Fleurdelochi: who wants to watch brokaw cry?


Homeworkwork Help:
Carolpetty316: Does anyone here know anything about prose?


Quills:

MsVictoriaLynn1: Carol... you can also flagrantly plagarize
Shakespeare, after all, HE did!
BinxB91: --- imagining Shakespeare writing with quill pen
DoomGrl: a turkey feather
Tallthinjones: he had to be a good first draft writer
MsVictoriaLynn1: do you know WHY he wrote with a quill pen?
Creepy Loner: Easily replaced?
DoomGrl: didnt have a electric pencil sharpener?
Creepy Loner: Forced him to take his time?
MsVictoriaLynn1: because Quill Typewriters hadn't been invented yet


What's With This Guy?:
Summers Eve L: Seriously. Does this guy have a journal on
all of his chats?
ManiacEyeball: binx?
DinosoreVagina: apparently so


Giving White Trash a Bad Name:
Tallthinjones: boy, i saw a thing about Tonya Harding in People
where she was monstrous a female boxer
Kamperkenii: Tall, I saw some pics of Tonya as a female boxer.
she's giving white trash a bad name

Thereoutof:
Q4Omega: while clothes make the man, dresses make... the...
more specifically, the undressing thereoutof


Unfinished Recital:
CordialCactus: I love bars and taverns
CordialCactus: beside the sea
CordialCactus: where people talk and drink
CordialCactus: just to drink and talk
CordialCactus: where joe nobody comes in and asks for
CordialCactus: his drink straight
Max 314159265358: quite a few on the Shelf drink and talk....
Tallthinjones: that's revealing, cactus
CordialCactus: and there are Joe Brawl anbd Jow Blade and Joe blow
and even simple joe
CordialCactus: just plain old joe
Max 314159265358: Morning Joe
CordialCactus: there white waves break in friendship
CordialCactus: a friendship of the people without rhetoric
CordialCactus: a wave of hello! and how are you doing?
CordialCactus: there it smells of fish, of mangrove, of rum, of salt
CordialCactus: and of a sweaty shirt put in the sun to dry
CordialCactus: ouch cramp
CordialCactus: just a second


What Do You Think of PatientOnion?:
MsVictoriaLynn1: I've found onion to be a person of many layers
WildCIAagent: Anyone taking Pat seriously needs a brain transplant.
DinosoreVagina: onion is one of a kind
Kamperkenii: Onion is not only one of a kind, but hopefully the very
last of that kind, too

Excuses in Advance:
Max 314159265358: For the record, I've bbq sauce on my keyboard and
some keys stick...

Bite a Dead Toad:
CordialCactus: you just gotta look for things to like about people...
its kind of fun

TiVo candidate:
Tallthinjones: it takes me more than a minute to pee if i'm watching
boxing i miss stuff


"I like cock. For sure":
Anais3233: if i were a lesbian, i'd be all about creepy. she's
super hot. but since neither of us are lesbians, and i'm married,
we're not going to be scissoring any time soon
WarHorseThor: anais, if both of you were single, and you were alone
in some distant airport hotel room, would you do her? yes or no?
Anais3233: no
Anais3233: not attractive to me
Anais3233: i like the cock
Anais3233: for sure
FoodSIut: thor doesn't like them either, he goes for the toes


On Vaginas:
Doc Whew: the vagina is like the flower of the body
Anais3233: vaginas look like a piece of chewed gum between two
folds of skin
FoodSIut: they look like a roast beef sandwich on steroids
Creepy Loner: Arby's.
WarHorseThor: onion, I work from the vagina up, then down
Anais3233: roast beef sammiches? vaginas?
Doc Whew: i like arbys
FoodSIut: Some fellas look at the eyes, some fellas look at the
nose, some fellas look at the size. I don't care if her eyes
are red, I don't care if her nose is long, I don't care if she's
underfed, first I look at the purse.
FoodSIut: i am an american

[What did I have in common with those other twenty-five year
olds? We were engaged in similar activities, but our frames of
reference were worlds apart. I remember hours spent backstage,
over months and months, laughing at one another's dating debacles
from recent years. Inverted nipples, lost erections, the wrong
body fluids making unwanted escapes; nothing was too private or
too grotesque to mention. I generally tried to moniter which
stories I had shared with my cast mates. One night I dove in
without thinking.
I recounted an anomaly I encountered in the hospital not long
before. The more debilitaed I got from medical treatments,
the more turned on I got. I'd never been hornier than when my
life was ebbing away, I said. I figured it had something to
do with the body sensing its extinction and wanting to
propogate. I told them how my ex-girl friend and I had had
sex in the hospital bathroom while a comatose roommate,
rendered senseless by a brain tumor the doctors hadn't been
able to locate, lay on the other side of the door only inches
away. My girl friend didn't even need to be there. I held my
thumb and forefinger a quarter inch apart.
"I jerked off this close to death," I said, smiling.
I looked up to see a roomful of stricken faces. Hands covered
mouths in horror. One of the women started to cry. I'd thought
I'd said something funny. Instead I'd ruined everyone's good
time.
It didn't seem fair. Weren't we telling our horror stories?
I'd thought that was the game. It was as if I'd shown up at
a Halloween party where everyone was dressed as skeletons, only
I'd brought along a real cadaver.]


BookShelf Blues:
Tem o Bedlam: Been the kind of night where Godwit's the fun part...



Odds and Ends:

Prospect26: i am typing with one hand.

MsVictoriaLynn1: I keep a cupcake in one of my filing cabinet
drawers

Tem o Bedlam: My dental tech takes calculus...

Q4Omega: i can't listen to any Who songs anymore

MsVictoriaLynn1: before retiring due to an injury, I was a rigger
and special FX technician in the live entertainment industry

Fleurdelochi: lonesome dove is my ironing movie

B00KGASM: bri. do you remember that one guy who sent me pictures
of himself dressed in leather, slamming his d**k with a
refrigerator door?

ManiacEyeball: I wouldn't come to this chat if the rest of the
internet wasn't right next to it.



Woman Seeks Silence:
Melodramamama22: my inner dialogue goes like this: you suck.
you don't suck! you suck. no you don't!


Power Point Paranoia:

Fleurdelochi: binx, i have done the research and prepared the slides
BinxB91: so why the dread?
Fleurdelochi: i dislike public speaking
Creepy Loner: Me too.
MsVictoriaLynn1: all that wasted guilt
Fleurdelochi: i have an almost dissociative reaction
Creepy Loner: I get twitchy and break out in hives.
BinxB91: Isn't it OK once you get started?
Fleurdelochi: no
Fleurdelochi: i go pretty much numb
MsVictoriaLynn1: imagine them naked Fleur
MsVictoriaLynn1: hell... imagine ME naked
Creepy Loner: Imagine me twitching and breaking out in hives.

Book Chat Cry Baby:
Fleurdelochi: some guy i talked to a few weeks ago just about
had a damn heart attack when i couldn't discuss thomas hardy

All She Needs:
Creepy Loner: Meh. When I go out, I take my journal,
my pens, my tobacco, my rolling materials, a can of room
spray, and a knife.
Creepy Loner: That's it.
Creepy Loner: That's all I need.


Mixed/Pure:
Anais3233: nancy grace is so funny, i have such mixed feelings
about her
Melodramamama22: anais, nancy grace makes me want to own an uzi


Love Letter:
Anais3233: binx
Anais3233: i think i need a new katytried every week
Anais3233: please get on that
Anais3233: thank you
Anais3233: love
Anais3233: anais


Trying Too Hard:
Yossarian4now: binx is trying to get good copy for his site lol
Melodramamama22: sometimes stuff just don't translate well in
here, you know?
Melodramamama22: i tried to get on there via saying twatwaffle
and ass giblet, but it didn't work



[Abbey Leigh was only twenty-five years old. That's not terribly
original behavior for a thirty-nine year old man. But, I could
point out, the full age difference was only in effect from
January to August. Five months out of the year the age difference
was --- numerically speaking --- a mere thirteen years. Does that
make it less tawdry?
But Abbey Leigh was too young for me. She eventually said
so herself during one of our later meetings after the relationship
had been consumated. She just phrased it differently. She said I
was too old for her. Only she used different words.
"You've got the lowest-hanging, droopiest balls I've ever seen,"
was how she put it.]

Books Not to Lend:
Max 314159265358: there is a book of suicide notes
Melodramamama22: otherwise known as "post secret", max
Max 314159265358: lent it out never to get it back


Scenes That Were Edited Out of Lassie:
Anais3233: did i tell you about when i first moved here and
my dog came dragging to me a tiny dead aligator from the
backyard??

When the "You Suck" voice shuts up:
Melodramamama22: did you ever think about the word dictation,
and then think of the word lactation?
Melodramamama22: and go, ew?


Forget Literature, Let's Party:

Phronsie: Back in the early 90s I read some current gay literature,
but I haven't in a long time now
Phronsie: that was back when I was still in contact with Peter,
my former gay, alcoholic, schizo friend
Phronsie: former friend
Anais3233: he sounds like fun to party with tho

Been Down So Long, It Looked Like ...:
Melodramamama22: i am sitting on a wooden fold out chair from the
old "negro" funeral parlor...
Melodramamama22: and it just pinched my butt
Melodramamama22: most action i've had in 2 weeks


Destination BookShelf:

Zilo Chatta: (taps screen) does this thing work? I don't
think it works...actually...i think it 'works.' I guess
i just need to read a book prior to coming in here to
contribute.
Creepy Loner: You don't need to contribute information on books.
Creepy Loner: We all have our own tastes and interests and can
find Amazon...
Creepy Loner: Just BS with us.
BinxB91: You've never read a book, Zilo?
Tem o Bedlam: I don't see why... Those of us who have read,
have read different books.
Zilo Chatta: Never read a book worth reading.
BinxB91: So what attracted you to the name "BookShelf"?
Creepy Loner: The possible mention of a book worth reading?


Raise My Spirit:
Q4Omega: only thing i think that could lift my spirit is bookgasm's
naked picture
Max 314159265358: you call it your spirit?

Punishing His Girl Friends:
Zenchef2006: hmmmm, guess i'll just have to give this chocolate
genocide to the dogs then


Mercy Rule:

Tallthinjones: rickie lee jones lives in lacey WA
we have the same plumber
Tallthinjones: she went to north thurston high school where
i janitored eleven years
Fleurdelochi: rickie lee jones lives in lacey?
Fleurdelochi: WHY WAS I NOT INFORMED OF THIS???


Bad Dreams:

Tallthinjones: i have a nightmare where i am flunking high school
and then realize i have two college degrees and it doesn't matter
Fleurdelochi: yeah, well, i dreamed i was naked under my lab coat
Tem o Bedlam: I dreamed I missed a patch shaving...


Stephen King Story Idea:
CordialCactus: ha.. i was kayaking a river in southern MO
a few years back... at 3 out of 5 stops, there was always at
least one mom hollaring CODY!


Prospect's New Best Friend:
Prospect26: Jam...just the person I need to see...
EDruezillaB: Uh oh, run, Jam.
EDruezillaB: Run!
EDruezillaB: Run like the WIND
Jam7604801: Edie i'm not Forrest Gump you know



Probably Not a Sandwich:

PatientOnion3: godwit you like getting beaten in submission, you
sexy sub you
Fleurdelochi: no dissin the subs, y0
PatientOnion3: I will tell jam to warm up the corn cobs
PatientOnion3: i love subs
Tem o Bedlam: Quips would require a sense of humor.
PatientOnion3: with lots of orange pizza bob sauce


["Almost everyone I know, I know better than you," my wife
quipped on our wedding night. Still, I had not a molecule
of doubt that we'd done the right thing.]


Salted Kurasawa:

Beysshoes: i love rashomon.
Godwit935: Beys, they're loaded with salt, you know.
Beysshoes: its a book title you silly godwit
Godwit935: No kidding?
Beysshoes: "Rashomon"


Yeah, But Whadya Gonna Do:
Fleurdelochi: yanno, it occurs to me (belatedly) that this
is really stupid